America's #1 Online Cigar Auction
first, best, biggest!

Last post 6 years ago by JadeRose. 139 replies replies.
3 Pages<123
I Return With A Report On My Ass
usahog Offline
#101 Posted:
Joined: 12-06-1999
Posts: 22,691
Yo Country no mention of her finding your palm pilot? what gives??? maybe Monday eh? LOL

Kidding Bro! hope everything works err umm comes out ok for you...

Hog
JadeRose Offline
#102 Posted:
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 19,525
Laughed harder at this than any other thread...EVER!!
duwan Offline
#103 Posted:
Joined: 01-17-2009
Posts: 8,196
Man, I just read this for the first time. All I can say is:

1. I hope I never have to go through something like that.

2. That is the funniest thread I have ever read. I still have tears in my eyes.
Diddler5612 Offline
#104 Posted:
Joined: 10-13-2009
Posts: 1,721
#1. I feel really bad for you and hope I never have to go through anything like that, but at the same time I think that had to be the funniest true story I've ever heard!!
n00b Offline
#105 Posted:
Joined: 11-25-2008
Posts: 4,606
^ Irony. Is having a name like that and posting in a thread like this.
Diddler5612 Offline
#106 Posted:
Joined: 10-13-2009
Posts: 1,721
^ True. Good one! LMAO!
greg6326 Offline
#107 Posted:
Joined: 01-07-2009
Posts: 441
great story, what was the resolution, bionic ass? we have the technology, we can rebuild it!
tribe77mac Offline
#108 Posted:
Joined: 10-16-2009
Posts: 689
O how I laughed with you brother.

first off this happened some time ago... hoping that all turned out okay.

The CLASSICS channel of the board is awesome...
Country Offline
#109 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
To the top with you!
longerash Offline
#110 Posted:
Joined: 06-06-2009
Posts: 702
Country wrote:
I'm worried about Doc turning my cheerio into a doughnut.

I am glad your doing good but like the rest here i turned different colors reading op
good way to make light of the subject
chiefburg Offline
#111 Posted:
Joined: 01-31-2005
Posts: 7,384
Patrick? So, how is the ole bung hole these days? Do you need TP for your cornhole? Or, is a plastic bag conveniently attached to your side?
coolbreeze68 Offline
#112 Posted:
Joined: 02-02-2010
Posts: 3,665
Holy Crap!!!! How did I miss this thread for so long.......I can't stop laughing..

Glad your doing better Country.
ZRX1200 Offline
#113 Posted:
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 60,473
Country would you cringe if I gave your thread two thumbs up??

engletl Offline
#114 Posted:
Joined: 12-26-2000
Posts: 26,493
I can't believe I missed this instant classic the first time around

good to hear you got your $h1t in order now
BuckyB93 Offline
#115 Posted:
Joined: 07-16-2004
Posts: 14,110
top
teedubbya Offline
#116 Posted:
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
topped for jk
JadeRose Offline
#117 Posted:
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 19,525
Still the funniest post EVAH!! Magwitch comes pretty close, though.
JKilburn Offline
#118 Posted:
Joined: 10-19-2011
Posts: 1,461
Now that is/was funny!
watchurai Offline
#119 Posted:
Joined: 09-17-2008
Posts: 9,289
Still the funniest post I can remember. I still can't get past mid-post without laughing out loud. 4:52 pm get's me EVERY time.
engletl Offline
#120 Posted:
Joined: 12-26-2000
Posts: 26,493
One of the top 5 for sure
jwweod Offline
#121 Posted:
Joined: 04-10-2007
Posts: 342
Topped...
dude this is the scariest/funniest post ever.
glad to hear your ass is good now.
daveincincy Offline
#122 Posted:
Joined: 08-11-2006
Posts: 20,033
Thanks for the top... Sarcasm I'm sure I read this all at the time, but don't recall much...maybe that's why I found the OP quite hi-larry-ous.

Then I read the first reply...

[email protected] wrote:
... my condolences ...

... I've had that surgery ... complete internals (upper & lower) and externals removed ...

... I felt like a Gorilla was shaking his fist in my a-hole all day long for like a month ...

Advice: Pick up a few gallons of ice cream before your surgery ... nice to have for after the surgery ... any flavor works ... you're not eating it ... you're putting it in a ziplock bag and pressing into the crack of your b-hole to help numb the pain ...


The advice is quite funny (I guess), but his reply is telling as to why he was such an a-hole on the forum. He was just making up for his lack of having one. LOL
Country Offline
#123 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
Man I forgot about passing out. My face started twitching and I couldn't control it and then... floor.
Pedros lawn service Offline
#124 Posted:
Joined: 02-27-2013
Posts: 936
This is quite gay... Sounds like a cry for help...
Country Offline
#125 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
Pedros. Out of curiosity, in your opinion, what about being gay would make someone need to cry out for help.

For the record, The doctor removed all ass tissue that she determined may have become infected with any gay tendencies during the surgery. You can never be too sure when staying safe from becoming a gay! Amirite!? Amirite?

Closet ****ing homo.
engletl Offline
#126 Posted:
Joined: 12-26-2000
Posts: 26,493
Hey...a Country sighting.

Hope all is well with you my friend
Country Offline
#127 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
And for the record, the reason I'm so sensitive about this subject is because I'm a very successful black man who happens to be gay, and I honestly don't know how you can sleep at night.

This is a sensitive topic for me. I'm a sensitive man to begin with.
MACS Offline
#128 Posted:
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,584
Country wrote:
And for the record, the reason I'm so sensitive about this subject is because I'm a very successful black man who happens to be gay, and I honestly don't know how you can sleep at night.

This is a sensitive topic for me. I'm a sensitive man to begin with.


You wouldn't be saying that if I wasn't in this wheelchair!
Pedros lawn service Offline
#129 Posted:
Joined: 02-27-2013
Posts: 936
So are you country catfish?...
Pedros lawn service Offline
#130 Posted:
Joined: 02-27-2013
Posts: 936
I think 99.99999% of the posters here haven't "return to post about my ass"

Sounds Gay-homo to me...
Pedros lawn service Offline
#131 Posted:
Joined: 02-27-2013
Posts: 936
Biscuit lips.
Country Offline
#132 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
MACS, as a double minority member (gay and black) I'm fully accepting of your single minority status (wheelchair). It's the straight and narrow from here on out, and heaven everlasting's my reward. Neither God nor man's got nothing on me now. Cmon in, boys. The water is fine.
Country Offline
#133 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
Pedros, I feel like we've gotten off (no pun intended) on the wrong foot. First impressions are hard (no pun intended) and it's difficult when there are two **** in the hen house (no pun intended.) If there's something I can do to undo the correct perception you've depicted me as, my ball are on the table and I'll come out blazing.


























****.















(Pun intended)
Country Offline
#134 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
We're filtering the word ****, cbid???? This is why we can't have nice things.
Pedros lawn service Offline
#135 Posted:
Joined: 02-27-2013
Posts: 936
Country is an attention whore...

Look at me and my butthole!
dkeage Offline
#136 Posted:
Joined: 03-05-2004
Posts: 15,135
Pedros lawn service wrote:
Country is an attention whore...

Look at me i'm a butthole!



Fixed it
Country Offline
#137 Posted:
Joined: 04-18-2008
Posts: 5,893
Pedro's, show us on the doll where the bad man touched you.
8trackdisco Offline
#138 Posted:
Joined: 11-06-2004
Posts: 59,987
MACS wrote:
You wouldn't be saying that if I wasn't in this wheelchair!


TUCKERSDAD!
JadeRose Offline
#139 Posted:
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 19,525
The infamous "Country's Butthole" thread
Users browsing this topic
Guest
3 Pages<123