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Mental Health
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Hank_The_Tank Offline
#1 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 8:22 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
I know this may not be a popular subject on these boards given all the manly-men and strong women, but curious of everyone's thoughts and to see if I can get any serious responses.

To head off the storm...I know..."Prayers"

I have really struggled with my overall mental health over the last few years and it seems to be only getting worse. I really struggle with worry/anxiety/stress/general happiness, to the point now where it is really interfering with my day to day life and doing my job. I know I should just be a man, suck it up, rub some dirt in it...but unfortunately this thought process doesn't get me far.

What are some of the ways you deal with these sort of issues other than smoking cigars, drinking, counting your blessings and prayer?

My doctor started me on Effexor but it definitely isn't working, at least at the low dose I am on. I go back next week to discuss how it has worked. Most likely they will just up the dosage for the time being.

Any help is appreciated.

Thanks!
Mattie B Offline
#2 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 8:50 AM EST
Joined: 12-12-2005
Posts: 6,350
Hank

I have no answers for you. I think I'm getting to experience something similar with some family though. Seek professional help. They are nothing more than a life coach to help you.


Now, disregard what is said from this point forward.

FYI....
NEVER EVER. try to have a serious conversation here.
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#3 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 8:56 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
Mattie B wrote:
Hank

I have no answers for you. I think I'm getting to experience something similar with some family though. Seek professional help. They are nothing more than a life coach to help you.


Now, disregard what is said from this point forward.

FYI....
NEVER EVER. try to have a serious conversation here.


Not a huge fan of psychologists. Did that once when I graduated HS, doubt I will ever do it again. Shrinks have ruined many people close to me. I have tried sitting down with my pastor, and it helps a little.
MACS Offline
#4 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 8:57 AM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,770
I think happiness is a choice. We're blessed in this country. We have food, clean water, shelter, work, etc...

Some people, even in this country, have no idea where their next meal is coming from. Focus on positive stuff and let the bad stuff work itself out. It will.
cacman Offline
#5 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 9:12 AM EST
Joined: 07-03-2010
Posts: 12,216
Hank_The_Tank wrote:
My doctor started me on Effexor but it definitely isn't working, at least at the low dose I am on. I go back next week to discuss how it has worked. Most likely they will just up the dosage for the time being.

YUCK! That stuff and all anti-depressant drugs are just plain nasty! YOU are the guinea pig as they can only "guess" at the medication and dose that MAY work. Unfortunately unlike what the commercials on TV tell you there is no magic pill that will make you happy, alleviate worry, anxiety and stress. There are new techniques that can measure your dopamine and other chemical outputs that can help Doctors narrow down the medication/dose, but again there is no guarantee. There is very little science behind mental health. And once you start taking anti-depressants, it's difficult to get off them. You can't just quit, but instead have to be weaned off them slowly. These meds change your body's chemistry and metabolism.

Some mental health issues can be hereditary. Consult your family health history.

Try changing your diet. Eliminate all processed sugar. Reduce your caffeine intake. Eat high protein foods while reducing carbs and breads. Exercise does wonders for eliminating stress. Doing these simple things will also change your body's chemistry and metabolism.

If all else fails, smoke a fat one!

But in all seriousness, good luck. I've lost a number of friends and relatives due to depression and mental health issues.
DrMaddVibe Offline
#6 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 9:15 AM EST
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,411
Log off here and seek professional help.

Maybe more than one opinion too.



Seriously.


Get well soon.
SMOKEYOU Offline
#7 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 9:23 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2015
Posts: 2,275
Do you have any excercise in your routine? As guman beings we metabolize stress horomone? Try burn those puppies away.
Buckwheat Offline
#8 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 9:28 AM EST
Joined: 04-15-2004
Posts: 12,251
Mattie B wrote:
Seek professional help.



+1,000,000 fog



Hank_The_Tank Offline
#9 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 9:48 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
Thanks guys, I appreciate the serious answers. Exercise is one of those things I struggle to find time for. I have a 5 year old daughter, 3 year old son and twin 1 year old daughters. I have troubles finding time to breath, let alone exercise. Looking forward to when it gets warm out to take walks with the family and maybe doing some running after they go to bed...if I am not passed out on the couch first.

Like I said, unfortunately I am not a huge fan of professional help. Tried it once and have zero desire to try again. Professional help has ruined the lives of too many people close to me as well.
cacman Offline
#10 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 9:52 AM EST
Joined: 07-03-2010
Posts: 12,216
Hank_The_Tank wrote:
Like I said, unfortunately I am not a huge fan of professional help. Tried it once and have zero desire to try again. Professional help has ruined the lives of too many people close to me as well.

But you're seeking professional help for the drugs???
dstieger Offline
#11 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:02 AM EST
Joined: 06-22-2007
Posts: 10,889
Prefer cbid help over professionals.....were you looking for help? ....or confirmation?

JK...Hank....I haven't got much tolerance for shrinks, either....I absolutely believe they are the answer for a lot of people....but, I also believe that a bad match is just as likely for some of us
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#12 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:10 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
cacman wrote:
But you're seeking professional help for the drugs???


Just going to my family doctor on the drugs. Just looking for something to reduce the anxiety on that front. I'm really not a huge fan of drugs but I am desperate.

I agree, shrinks are good for some people...just not me.
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#13 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:11 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
dstieger wrote:
Prefer cbid help over professionals.....were you looking for help? ....or confirmation?

JK...Hank....I haven't got much tolerance for shrinks, either....I absolutely believe they are the answer for a lot of people....but, I also believe that a bad match is just as likely for some of us


Just looking for opinions from "friends". haha
KingoftheCove Offline
#14 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:23 AM EST
Joined: 10-08-2011
Posts: 7,631
SSRIs can take quite a bit of time to reach efficacy, and then additional time to tweak dosage.
Thus it can be months before they are effective..............part of the problem with them.
Very different in that respect than anxiolytics or sedative/hypnotics..........and I know I'm being Captain Obvious.

Guess I'm a fence straddler here, as I have seen SSRIs literally transform people's lives.
Also have seen tradional Rx therapy with various anti-depressants and couch therapy fail miserably, or worse.

As a side note, I've seen MMJ be very helpful in all cases, with very little side effects in the handful of people I know using it for various mental health .reasons.
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#15 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:26 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
KingoftheCove wrote:
SSRIs can take quite a bit of time to reach efficacy, and then additional time to tweak dosage.
Thus it can be months before they are effective..............part of the problem with them.
Very different in that respect than anxiolytics or sedative/hypnotics..........and I know I'm being Captain Obvious.

Guess I'm a fence straddler here, as I have seen SSRIs literally transform people's lives.
Also have seen tradional Rx therapy with various anti-depressants and couch therapy fail miserably, or worse.

As a side note, I've seen MMJ be very helpful in all cases, with very little side effects in the handful of people I know using it for various mental health .reasons.


I have been on the Effexor for a month now. Don't see any change in my anxiety levels (it has been really bad the last couple weeks). I was told it takes 4-6 weeks to really get moving in your system, hence the doctor follow-up next week.

Not sure what anxiolytics are exactly but I know I am allergic to Celexa so they are staying away from that side of Rx tree.
gummy jones Offline
#16 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:36 AM EST
Joined: 07-06-2015
Posts: 7,969
being a working father in this complicated world is a stressful process
we are just so overloaded with information and expectations nowadays that it can be overwhelming
stress seems to be more the rule than the exception and you are not alone
to the best of my knowledge, there is no simple answer nor is there an easy solution
i had a similar conversation with a trusted, successful Christian friend and his answer was "i had complete and constant unrest until i actually trusted God."
Thunder.Gerbil Offline
#17 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:37 AM EST
Joined: 11-02-2006
Posts: 121,359
Mattie B wrote:

Now, disregard what is said from this point forward.



Yep.

BTW, did you know that MattieB is really not gay?
ZRX1200 Offline
#18 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:49 AM EST
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 60,589
That's what he says........but he also said it isn't gay if "you're thinking about a chick" whIle you do it.

Hank, I wasn't a therapist fan either. Had a bad experience with a divorce councilor when I was a kid try to convince my feelings didn't matter. But later my wife and I had an excellent therapist (didn't work but...) I had an eye opening experience. Now my lady and our oldest boy see help and they both have good ones.

What I'm getting at is this, find a good one and that is the key. A good therapist will discuss drug treatment of all kinds and the pros and cons. But will delve into things a bit to see what is actually the best course of action for you.

Good luck and don't procrastinate, we do like ya here. Especially Mattie B, just don't believe any of his sweet talking.
Mattie B Offline
#19 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:50 AM EST
Joined: 12-12-2005
Posts: 6,350
Prove it!
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#20 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:57 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
Mattie B wrote:
Prove it!


Prove that you are gay or straight? ha
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#21 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 10:57 AM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
ZRX1200 wrote:
That's what he says........but he also said it isn't gay if "you're thinking about a chick" whIle you do it.

Hank, I wasn't a therapist fan either. Had a bad experience with a divorce councilor when I was a kid try to convince my feelings didn't matter. But later my wife and I had an excellent therapist (didn't work but...) I had an eye opening experience. Now my lady and our oldest boy see help and they both have good ones.

What I'm getting at is this, find a good one and that is the key. A good therapist will discuss drug treatment of all kinds and the pros and cons. But will delve into things a bit to see what is actually the best course of action for you.

Good luck and don't procrastinate, we do like ya here. Especially Mattie B, just don't believe any of his sweet talking.


Thanks for the advice.
cacman Offline
#22 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 11:09 AM EST
Joined: 07-03-2010
Posts: 12,216
Hank_The_Tank wrote:
Just going to my family doctor on the drugs.

He is a professional... a professional at prescribing drugs. But little help with mental health issues.

Taking a pill for a month but not doing anything else differently is not going to reduce anxiety. At that point all you are doing is asking for a pill to make you feel better.
DrafterX Offline
#23 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 11:12 AM EST
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,547
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me...
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy...
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane... Whistle
tonygraz Offline
#24 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 11:17 AM EST
Joined: 08-11-2008
Posts: 20,243
I heard Drafter's mother had him tested.
Gene363 Offline
#25 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 11:26 AM EST
Joined: 01-24-2003
Posts: 30,810
There is no magic pill that fixes mental health problems.

There is no magic pill that fixes mental health problems.

There is no magic pill that fixes mental health problems.

Sorry, it bears repeating..

It should be treated by a mental health professional and only a psychiatrist should be prescribing psychotropic drugs. Drug companies, doctors, and patients have colluded to get far too many people on drugs with serious side effects and consequences. MDs are handing out 'scripts for dangerous drugs like candy at Halloween. There is no easy pill you can pop to solve all your problems.
dstieger Offline
#26 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 11:37 AM EST
Joined: 06-22-2007
Posts: 10,889
You just need to keep trying until you find the right doc. When you get one that says, "The fix is easy: Go fishing more often.", you'll know you're well on your way to a happy life.
opelmanta1900 Offline
#27 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 11:58 AM EST
Joined: 01-10-2012
Posts: 13,954
I had a long response written out and deleted it... no one ever reads those...

It sounds like maybe you're dealing with a little depression? That word has a lot of misunderstanding surrounding it, but if indeed that's what you're dealing with, deal with it... don't toy around with it, find a solution... might be drugs, might be counseling, could be any number of things... there's no silver bullet but some thing or combination of things will work...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XiCrniLQGYc
victor809 Offline
#28 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:00 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
Start with getting rid.of at least 2 of your children. Whichever 2 take the most time.

2nd... drink. Drink enough that the woman you're talking to leaves.

3rd... well... I think I just solved most of your problems in the first 2 steps.
opelmanta1900 Offline
#29 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:02 PM EST
Joined: 01-10-2012
Posts: 13,954
Hank_The_Tank wrote:
Just going to my family doctor on the drugs. Just looking for something to reduce the anxiety on that front. I'm really not a huge fan of drugs but I am desperate.

I agree, shrinks are good for some people...just not me.

Marijuana x 1 million buddy... seriously... if you're looking for a temporary patch cuz you're desperate, SMOKE MARIJUANA... all the benefits of pharmaceuticals with none of the risk....
madspackler Offline
#30 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:11 PM EST
Joined: 03-07-2000
Posts: 3,608
It takes a smart man to recognize he has a problem, and a smarter man to acknowledge he needs help. You are already on your way to a solution. I have family members who suffer from depression. The right answer for each one of them was different but they all sought help until they found the professional or group of professionals that worked for them. Please keep working at it until you find what works for you. It is likely a combination of exercise, therapy and medication. You seem like a great guy with a lot of promise in front of you. Use that as your motivation. You can do this and you are not alone.

And we actually care.
cacman Offline
#31 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:15 PM EST
Joined: 07-03-2010
Posts: 12,216
MJ may relieve some anxiety, but technically it is a depressant and not recommended for use in conjunction with anti-depressant drugs and treating depression. Just sayin'...
opelmanta1900 Offline
#32 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:22 PM EST
Joined: 01-10-2012
Posts: 13,954
If he's gonna throw random chemicals at his body in hopes of making himself feel good, he's a lot better off with pot than a prescription drug that can cause permanent issues...

And I've dealt with depression for much of my life and no doubt, marijuana helps...
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#33 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:26 PM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
MJ is not an option...my wife would literally divorce me...then kill me. ha

Thanks for the help guys, I appreciate the serious note on this thread...while it lasts.
KingoftheCove Offline
#34 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:34 PM EST
Joined: 10-08-2011
Posts: 7,631
cacman wrote:
MJ may relieve some anxiety, but technically it is a depressant and not recommended for use in conjunction with anti-depressant drugs and treating depression. Just sayin'...

This depends on what you're reading.
There is ground breaking research going on right now.
There is also a concerted effort by certain factions to downplay/marginalize the efficacy of various MMJ compounds across a multitude of illnesses and conditions, an effort that has been going on for decades.
Thankfully, those people are finally being discredited, as MMJ gets recognized as a viable, if not superior therapy, for many diseases.


Still, it is currently agreed that persons with borderline schizophrenia and/or psychosis should not be attempting to treat themselves with MMJ..............for now.
There are numerous compounds found in weed, and many hold promise as really amazing future therapies.
SMOKEYOU Offline
#35 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:40 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2015
Posts: 2,275
Id love to see a MJ box pass in my lifetime....
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#36 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:47 PM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
SMOKEYOU wrote:
Id love to see a MJ box pass in my lifetime....


That literally made me laugh out loud.
Thunder.Gerbil Offline
#37 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:52 PM EST
Joined: 11-02-2006
Posts: 121,359
victor809 wrote:
Start with getting rid.of at least 2 of your children. Whichever 2 take the most time.

2nd... drink. Drink enough that the woman you're talking to leaves.

3rd... well... I think I just solved most of your problems in the first 2 steps.



You should listen to him, Hank. He's in pre-med.
DrafterX Offline
#38 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 12:53 PM EST
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,547
Puppy-dogs are good for the soul... Mellow
burnem2 Offline
#39 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:01 PM EST
Joined: 12-23-2009
Posts: 628
Guess I'll weigh in if for no other reason than to identify as yet another who has suffered from anxiety/depression to let you know you are not alone.

I agree with the majority of what has been shared. There is no simple solution to this problem. Here are the steps that worked for me. Identify that there's a problem and seek help. Started with my MD and low doses of different SSRI that work well together. Have Xanax for the really bad days..... not needed very often and .5 to 1 mg usually gets the job done. Learned techniques for reducing anxiety (grounding, etc).

After an initial foray into the chemical realm, I stretched myself and found a good therapist/counselor. I don't care about seeing a psychiatrist for anything other than meds. I am a Christian and found a Christian counselor that borrows techniques such as energy work and even prayers and chants from other religions (sounds hookie, I know, but it has worked for me). Got honest with myself and the counselor and started seeing results.

I am busy too, but I find that days when I can't make the gym, that even 30 minutes of exercise in the home (push up, sit ups, squats, high step inplace walking) with no equipment is enough to get the endorphins going.

Believe that God is sending help as you work through your issues. Prayer and meditation is a daily ritual for me. All this has led to decreased meds and better mental health. Still seeing my counselor.
DrafterX Offline
#40 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:13 PM EST
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,547
TW whacks off... Mellow
tailgater Offline
#41 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:38 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
Hank_The_Tank wrote:
Thanks for the advise.


It would help MY mental health if you used words correctly.
tailgater Offline
#42 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:40 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
madspackler wrote:
It takes a smart man to recognize he has a problem


I'm glad I don't have a problem.
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#43 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:42 PM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
tailgater wrote:
It would help MY mental health if you used words correctly.


whoops...advice...haha
tailgater Offline
#44 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:42 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185

Despite knowing very little about this subject, I do know that it is a terrible idea to take drugs for mental issues without seeing a specialist.
Pretty straight forward.
itsawaldo Offline
#45 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:53 PM EST
Joined: 09-10-2006
Posts: 4,221
Interesting you wrote this today as I am seeing my Doc tomorrow.

I admire you asking however with these guys......the kind of cigars we smoke, pancakes/waffles, camping, dogs/cats, gladiator movies, whisky, scotch, bourbon, vodka, gin, wine, blondes, brunettes, clams, bearded or not, etc, etc, etc. are open topics, mental health is a new one.

You've gotten some sound advice, get help, get drugs, pray more, smoke weed (I like that one)!

Admittedly I have never had a tougher two years in my life in regards to my work and life challenges. General malaise is the best I can come up with is how I feel. Been on low dose of drugs for 18 months and have yet to see a shrink. Haven't felt the need but Mrs. Waldo is thinking I should and I am asking Doc about this, weed too!

When I was working/at work, social...any family and friends activity I am good but when I am alone, well they say an idle mind is the devils workshop, or something close to that. Think I need a dog to walk, miss pet therapy.

Again, glad you brought this up and I wish you the best of luck dealing with what you're going through. I believe we are stronger men for recognizing as well as realizing we need a little help once and a while.
victor809 Offline
#46 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 1:55 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
Yeah... tails right. You need to ask Ram.
Thunder.Gerbil Offline
#47 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 2:10 PM EST
Joined: 11-02-2006
Posts: 121,359
victor809 wrote:
Yeah... tails right.


There's a first.
cacman Offline
#48 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 2:16 PM EST
Joined: 07-03-2010
Posts: 12,216
ZRX1200 wrote:
What I'm getting at is this, find a good one [therapist] and that is the key.

IIRC JadeRose only charges a nickel, and he accepts PayPal.
Stinkdyr Offline
#49 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 2:21 PM EST
Joined: 06-16-2009
Posts: 9,948
Hank_The_Tank wrote:
Thanks guys, I appreciate the serious answers. Exercise is one of those things I struggle to find time for.......... I have troubles finding time to breath, let alone exercise...............



As Yoda would advise you...........Try not, you must DO.

Applause
Hank_The_Tank Offline
#50 Posted: Wed, Jan 4 2017, 2:23 PM EST
Joined: 11-15-2016
Posts: 3,677
itsawaldo wrote:
Interesting you wrote this today as I am seeing my Doc tomorrow.

I admire you asking however with these guys......the kind of cigars we smoke, pancakes/waffles, camping, dogs/cats, gladiator movies, whisky, scotch, bourbon, vodka, gin, wine, blondes, brunettes, clams, bearded or not, etc, etc, etc. are open topics, mental health is a new one.

You've gotten some sound advice, get help, get drugs, pray more, smoke weed (I like that one)!

Admittedly I have never had a tougher two years in my life in regards to my work and life challenges. General malaise is the best I can come up with is how I feel. Been on low dose of drugs for 18 months and have yet to see a shrink. Haven't felt the need but Mrs. Waldo is thinking I should and I am asking Doc about this, weed too!

When I was working/at work, social...any family and friends activity I am good but when I am alone, well they say an idle mind is the devils workshop, or something close to that. Think I need a dog to walk, miss pet therapy.

Again, glad you brought this up and I wish you the best of luck dealing with what you're going through. I believe we are stronger men for recognizing as well as realizing we need a little help once and a while.






Thanks. It is good to know that other guys are going through this as well. Helps a little bit.
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