A Greek and a Scotsman were sitting in a Starbucks cafe discussing who had the superior culture.
Over triple lattes the Greek guy says, "Well we Greeks built the Parthenon" and arched his eyebrows.
The Scotsman replies, "Well ... it was the Scots that discovered the Summer and Winter Solstices."
The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics."
The Scotsman, nodding in agreement says, "Scots were the ones who built the first timepieces and calendars."
And so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says, "The Greeks invented sex!"
The Scotsman replies, "Aye, that is true, but it was we Scots who introduced it to women!"
After my prostate exam the doctor left and the nurse came in. She whispered three words that no man ever wants to hear..."Who was that?"
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.
The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize.
“Please allow me to help. I’m a Physio-Therapist and I know I can relieve your pain if you’d allow me.”
“Oh, no, I’ll be alright. I’ll be fine in a few minutes,” the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands there at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside.
She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, “How does that feel?”
“Feels great,” he replied; “but I still think my thumb’s broken!”
I was in a bar with my mate the other night when he started talking about the show "Fear Factor".
.He said, "could you ever eat an ostrich ****"?
I replied, " I tried eating one when I was drunk, but I couldn't do it".
"Because the taste was disgusting", he asked.
I said, "no, because it kept kicking me in the head".
Have a good one. Julian
