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Discussions with a FEMALE FED-EX GROUND VAN DRIVER...
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Mr. Jones Offline
#1 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 5:25 PM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
fog
d'oh!

BOYEEEEEE..hey buddy!

Was I ever RIIIIIIGGGHHHHTTTT...

OR WAS I RIGHT ABOUT..

LAZY-ASS S.L.A.C.K.E.R. MILLENIALS...

I was at the local mountian convienence
Store and this FedEx delivery chick came in with a walmart.com package for the apartment above the store...

As I walked outside I noticed she left the sliding van side door wide open...
Something they never do in Lancaster because of loser low life criminals...but in the mountains...nobody blatantly steals anything in the daylight...

Sooooo...I glance in the VAN...
ALL I FREAKIN SEE IS....

60% of all the shelves are filled with
C.H.E.W.Y..COM BOXES!!!!!

AND the other 15% are all walmart.com boxes...then..
25% are normal mail-order boxes from people to people with handwriting on them...

I say to the chick...

"Boy...you must really love CHEWY.COM..
THE FUUUCKING MILLENIAL SLACKERS ARE REALLY RUNNING YOU RAGGED...I SEE...
( POINTING AT HER SHELVES)...if you can't drive to the store to buy your own dog food then you are a freaking moron!!!"

She laughs outloud!!

then she says.."AMEN TO THOSE WORDS OF WISDOM!!, I hate chewy.com...some of those boxes are 70 POUNDS & OVER...and they are a pain in the ass to deliver"

I shake my noggin in agreement and disbelief...

I called this NEW NORMAL SCOURGE OF MILLENIAL PSYCHE...B.I.G.T.I.M.E.!!!

YES...I DID..
frankj1 Offline
#2 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 5:55 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,211
what if the dog food is for seeing eye dogs for blind peoples?
opelmanta1900 Offline
#3 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 6:11 PM EST
Joined: 01-10-2012
Posts: 13,954
You saying blind people can't be lazy? Why have the dog if you ain't goin nowhere?
frankj1 Offline
#4 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 6:13 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,211
OK, let the lazy blind whiners drive to the store.
Thunder.Gerbil Offline
#5 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 6:36 PM EST
Joined: 11-02-2006
Posts: 121,359
Maybe all the dog food is for an FBI team that is on a stakeout.
delta1 Offline
#6 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 6:41 PM EST
Joined: 11-23-2011
Posts: 28,772
Think
tamapatom Offline
#7 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 6:51 PM EST
Joined: 03-19-2015
Posts: 7,381
Now we can identify those sneaky bassards when you smell the dog food on their breath.
RMAN4443 Offline
#8 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 7:37 PM EST
Joined: 09-29-2016
Posts: 7,683
Thunder.Gerbil wrote:
Maybe all the dog food is for an FBI team that is on a stakeout.

Wouldn't they be eating Stake???Anxious
Mr. Jones Offline
#9 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 9:50 PM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
OMG..

RESPONSES
R
TOO FUNNY ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†
Mr. Jones Offline
#10 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 9:55 PM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
Frank...

Let the poor AMISH "BUGGY" guys transport dem' peeples with the special dogs to the store....

Just like the MEGA-VAN DRIVERS around Lancaster, pa who cart the RICH Amish around daily IN THOSE 20 FOOT VANS....

The poor Amish sect buggy peeples can't afford van rides so they need to be Uber drivers for the special dog owners..
frankj1 Offline
#11 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 10:12 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,211
glad we made you laugh, Y.O.G.I.
izonfire Offline
#12 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 10:17 PM EST
Joined: 12-09-2013
Posts: 8,644
Mr. Jones wrote:
then she says.."AMEN TO THOSE WORDS OF WISDOM!!, I hate chewy.com...some of those boxes are 70 POUNDS & OVER...and they are a pain in the ass to deliver"


You shoulda just told her โ€œhey, itโ€™s keeping you in shape bitch!โ€,
and slapped her on the ass
izonfire Offline
#13 Posted: Wed, Sep 18 2019, 10:19 PM EST
Joined: 12-09-2013
Posts: 8,644
frankj1 wrote:
glad we made you laugh, Y.O.G.I.


Heeeeeyyyyyy, BooBoo!
fiddler898 Offline
#14 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 6:15 AM EST
Joined: 06-15-2009
Posts: 3,782
How do you know the dogsโ€™ OWNERS ordered the food? After all, on the internet, nobody knows youโ€™re a dog...
gummy jones Offline
#15 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 6:53 AM EST
Joined: 07-06-2015
Posts: 7,969
best deal = lazy?

superior options shipped to the house 25% cheaper isnt lazy

everyone doesnt feed their dog ol' roy corn food

that chick should thank them for her job security
KingoftheCove Offline
#16 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 9:45 AM EST
Joined: 10-08-2011
Posts: 7,630
gummy jones wrote:
best deal = lazy?

superior options shipped to the house 25% cheaper isnt lazy

everyone doesnt feed their dog ol' roy corn food

that chick should thank them for her job security

^^this
Mr. Jones Offline
#17 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 9:50 AM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
"Best deal" CHEAPSKATE COMUTER LOSERS
= CARBON FOOTPRINTS TO THE GAZILLIONTH POWER CUZ UR A LAZY SLACKER DOUCHE
Mr. Jones Offline
#18 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 9:55 AM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
Izon....

At the end ...I did stare at her curvy but very tight size 12
Butt and very cute mug and winked...then I asked her if she swallowed...

Her response , with a B.I.G. SMILE ...

" THAT'S A BIG AAAAAAAA-FIRMATIVE!!!"

then she buckled her seatbelt and pealed off.. kicking gravel in my direction...Leaving me with lonely mountain convienence store parking lot ...WOOD...
gummy jones Offline
#19 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:01 AM EST
Joined: 07-06-2015
Posts: 7,969
Mr. Jones wrote:
"Best deal" CHEAPSKATE COMUTER LOSERS
= CARBON FOOTPRINTS TO THE GAZILLIONTH POWER CUZ UR A LAZY SLACKER DOUCHE


i stand corrected
Mr. Jones Offline
#20 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:04 AM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
Gummy....W.H.O. LOVES YA' ????

JUST jerkin' ur chain...

Your a good egg... ( but a lazy cheapskate too...
Bwuhahahahahahahahaha!!!)
gummy jones Offline
#21 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:18 AM EST
Joined: 07-06-2015
Posts: 7,969
lol
teedubbya Offline
#22 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:20 AM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
I heard all the money taken from your hut was invested in to chewy.com


by the way great prices and convenience.
frankj1 Offline
#23 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:27 AM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,211
parking lot WOOD!
I gotta find a way to drop that into a conversation.
Thanks Jones
teedubbya Offline
#24 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:30 AM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
I stopped when both her butt and mug winked
victor809 Offline
#25 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:36 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
They also provide prescription dog food, which the stores don't stock anyway. They'll get it for you if you bring in a prescription, but it's just being shipped there anyway. May as well ship it to your house directly at that point.
victor809 Offline
#26 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 10:37 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
.... that and it gets me hard to destroy the environment for other people's children.
tailgater Offline
#27 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:12 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
victor809 wrote:
.... that and it gets me hard to destroy the environment for other people's children.


So Trump can expect your vote in 2020?
victor809 Offline
#28 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:15 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
I already said I would.
teedubbya Offline
#29 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:18 PM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
you spelt wood wrong
Thunder.Gerbil Offline
#30 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:23 PM EST
Joined: 11-02-2006
Posts: 121,359
Mr. Jones wrote:
Izon....

At the end ...I did stare at her curvy but very tight size 12
Butt and very cute mug and winked...then I asked her if she swallowed...

Her response , with a B.I.G. SMILE ...

" THAT'S A BIG AAAAAAAA-FIRMATIVE!!!"

then she buckled her seatbelt and pealed off.. kicking gravel in my direction...Leaving me with lonely mountain convienence store parking lot ...WOOD...



How do you know she wasn't an agent that was just playing you?

It is FED(eral)EX after all.
victor809 Offline
#31 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:25 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
....I want to know how a size 12 can be "tight".
DrafterX Offline
#32 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:40 PM EST
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,534
Maybe she's an 18 stuffed into 12 jeans... Mellow
victor809 Offline
#33 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:55 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
...oh ... It's almost like you have some inside information here
teedubbya Offline
#34 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:56 PM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
drafter wears wrangler huskys with the size sharpied out
DrafterX Offline
#35 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:59 PM EST
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,534
That's not true.. Not talking

In fact I'm wearing jeans i hadn't worn in prolly 5 years or so... just glad i didn't throw them all away... Mellow
dstieger Offline
#36 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:00 PM EST
Joined: 06-22-2007
Posts: 10,889
Sharpies are like the new duct tape
teedubbya Offline
#37 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:05 PM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
DrafterX wrote:
That's not true.. Not talking

In fact I'm wearing jeans i hadn't worn in prolly 5 years or so... just glad i didn't throw them all away... Mellow



Size extra whale?
RMAN4443 Offline
#38 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:07 PM EST
Joined: 09-29-2016
Posts: 7,683
teedubbya wrote:
Size extra whale?

Orca fit.....Anxious
victor809 Offline
#39 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:13 PM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
DrafterX wrote:
That's not true.. Not talking

In fact I'm wearing jeans i hadn't worn in prolly 5 years or so... just glad i didn't throw them all away... Mellow


I'm sorry you put all that weight back on to be as chonky as you were 5 years ago.

Better luck next time. :(
teedubbya Offline
#40 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:18 PM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
poor poor DrafterXXXL
CelticBomber Offline
#41 Posted: Thu, Sep 19 2019, 3:30 PM EST
Joined: 05-03-2012
Posts: 6,786
frankj1 wrote:
OK, let the lazy blind whiners drive to the store.


Darwin in action! This should be mandatory! They are so lazy the dog will be driving anyway. Who can stay mad at a Labrador?
Mr. Jones Offline
#42 Posted: Fri, Sep 20 2019, 9:30 PM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
#31 Victor

Think...of Serena Williams...the tightest in shape
size 12
Butt on the planet...

U can bounce quarters off her butt ...that go at least 15 ft away...
ZRX1200 Offline
#43 Posted: Fri, Sep 20 2019, 9:37 PM EST
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 60,560
Looked like two dogs inside a bag fighting over a treat when she walked away, I bet it could chew bubblegum.

(Thatโ€™s what we were going for!)
delta1 Offline
#44 Posted: Sat, Sep 21 2019, 12:59 PM EST
Joined: 11-23-2011
Posts: 28,772
Mr. Jones wrote:


WOOD
izonfire Offline
#45 Posted: Sat, Sep 21 2019, 1:09 PM EST
Joined: 12-09-2013
Posts: 8,644
delta1 wrote:
Mr. Jones wrote:
WOOD



Thatโ€™s all you got from Mr Jones post, huh?
Hmmmmmm... Think

JadeRose Offline
#46 Posted: Sun, Sep 22 2019, 9:13 AM EST
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 19,525
Mr. Jones wrote:
"Best deal" CHEAPSKATE COMUTER LOSERS
= CARBON FOOTPRINTS TO THE GAZILLIONTH POWER CUZ UR A LAZY SLACKER DOUCHE







So..it's better if everyone gets in their vehicles and goes to the store separately than to have one vehicle efficiently make deliveries? Not seeing the logic, Jonesy
Mr. Jones Offline
#47 Posted: Mon, Sep 23 2019, 9:57 AM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
Jade...

People always need to eat...

H.E.N.C.E. ....

THESE PEEPLES GO TO THE STORE TO BUY FOOD ALREADY...THEY ARE NOT MAKING A "special trip" just to buy pet food"...

They are there already buying human food...

They are just to lazy to spend the time and get the pets food too in the same trip...and too W.E.A.K. AND LAZY TO LIFT THE 50 POUND BAG INTO THE CART...then into the car...then into their H.U.T.S.!!!

GET IT NOW?
victor809 Offline
#48 Posted: Mon, Sep 23 2019, 10:14 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
Mr. Jones wrote:
Jade...

People always need to eat...

H.E.N.C.E. ....

THESE PEEPLES GO TO THE STORE TO BUY FOOD ALREADY...THEY ARE NOT MAKING A "special trip" just to buy pet food"...

They are there already buying human food...

They are just to lazy to spend the time and get the pets food too in the same trip...and too W.E.A.K. AND LAZY TO LIFT THE 50 POUND BAG INTO THE CART...then into the car...then into their H.U.T.S.!!!

GET IT NOW?


You go to the pet food store for your peeple food?

This is starting to explain some of your posts....
teedubbya Offline
#49 Posted: Mon, Sep 23 2019, 10:20 AM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
The only place to get my dogs food is about 40 minutes from me. Thank god for chewy. Auto deliver, better price, and it pisses off Jones.

Winning.
Mr. Jones Offline
#50 Posted: Mon, Sep 23 2019, 10:23 AM EST
Joined: 06-12-2005
Posts: 19,400
Change brands ....ya lazy loser
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