reminds me of a truly regrettable event in my life...after my Mother (RIP) died, the surviving siblings (my two sisters and a brother) gathered at her house...
my sisters and I were in the process of doing a traditional Buddhist ceremony in her honor, burning incense, paper money for use in the afterlife, food offerings, etc....just like she had done on all the occasions of the passing of friends and relatives, our father and two brothers...
my brother (RIP), an ordained Christian Baptist pastor, arrived midway, and put a stop to the Buddhist ceremony...instead he did a Christian prayer and sang some songs...we joined him...
afterwards, my sisters and I were struck by his intolerance, and his insistence that we stop...we believed we could have done both...and that Mom would've been happy with both...
it took me awhile to realize that none of those events after her death were meaningful to our mother...only to her survivors