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Last post 4 years ago by USNGunner. 45 replies replies.
A liberal and a conservative go to a gun range...
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tailgater Offline
#1 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 8:50 AM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
After teaching two noobs how to spray the lead, we couldn't pry these two apart...


After being a gracious host (the most gracious, ever), Ed was a reluctant participant in the "eww, that's gross. take my picture with it" game we all play here in our virtual zone.
ed with fuzz (640x481).jpg
MACS Offline
#2 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 9:21 AM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
Attaboy, Ed... get these 'tards on board with the second amendment!!

And don't put that thing anywhere teedubbya has put it.
tailgater Offline
#3 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 10:23 AM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
I hope you're not including me as a libtard, dear sir.
I may reside just downstream from the wake of Chappaquidkicks Chevy, but please color me red.
teedubbya Offline
#4 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 11:21 AM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
tailgater wrote:
please color me red.



He sure wants his turn with fuzz
MACS Offline
#5 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 11:23 AM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
tailgater wrote:
I hope you're not including me as a libtard, dear sir.
I may reside just downstream from the wake of Chappaquidkicks Chevy, but please color me red.


Of course, my friend... in Frank's case the prefix is 'lib'... in your case it's 're'. BigGrin
ZRX1200 Online
#6 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 11:23 AM EST
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 60,582
Ed, just remember no sudden movements.

Fuzz likes a smoove operator.
tailgater Offline
#7 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 11:31 AM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
LOL at MACS!
bgz Offline
#8 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 12:36 PM EST
Joined: 07-29-2014
Posts: 13,023
^lmfao
Whistlebritches Offline
#9 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 12:39 PM EST
Joined: 04-23-2006
Posts: 22,128
I'm disappointed Ed.........Jamie held Fuzzy for over two years in his most loving care.You couldn't at least cradle him and kiss him gently on his forehead.WTF
jackconrad Offline
#10 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 3:31 PM EST
Joined: 06-09-2003
Posts: 67,461
fog
frankj1 Offline
#11 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 4:13 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
don't forget, Fuzz has been resting in a zip lock bag, in a locked bedroom, in my house for a few months now so he may have been spurning Ed's advances. And his hair is a mess.

He seemed to be more comfortable when the Davidoffs showed up.

btw, very funny Shawn.
fiddler898 Offline
#12 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 5:27 PM EST
Joined: 06-15-2009
Posts: 3,782
frankj1 wrote:
don't forget, Fuzz has been resting in a zip lock bag, in a locked bedroom, in my house for a few months now so he may have been spurning Ed's advances. And his hair is a mess.


I thought he was in Cleveland all this week.
frankj1 Offline
#13 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 6:21 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
back with a bang, eh?

HA!
edin508 Offline
#14 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 7:22 PM EST
Joined: 06-19-2012
Posts: 4,647
Fuzzy tickled.
tailgater Offline
#15 Posted: Thu, Jul 21 2016, 8:15 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
I'm still laughing at MACS comment.
JadeRose Offline
#16 Posted: Fri, Jul 22 2016, 2:41 PM EST
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 19,525
MACS wrote:
Of course, my friend... in Frank's case the prefix is 'lib'... in your case it's 're'. BigGrin





Outstanding!


Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
frankj1 Offline
#17 Posted: Fri, Jul 22 2016, 5:01 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
but which is worse?
tailgater Offline
#18 Posted: Fri, Jul 22 2016, 5:36 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
I'm laughing.
You're not.

Do the math...
frankj1 Offline
#19 Posted: Fri, Jul 22 2016, 5:48 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
no fairsies. you know I'm not good wif numbahs.
MACS Offline
#20 Posted: Sat, Jul 23 2016, 1:57 PM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
frankj1 wrote:
but which is worse?


Six of one, half dozen of the other.

My comments were obviously meant to elicit a laugh. I'm glad it worked. ThumpUp
xibbumbero Offline
#21 Posted: Sat, Jul 23 2016, 5:46 PM EST
Joined: 01-25-2002
Posts: 12,535
We need to get you drunk again. That elicited many laughs. X BigGrin
edin508 Offline
#22 Posted: Sat, Jul 23 2016, 6:04 PM EST
Joined: 06-19-2012
Posts: 4,647
BTW, now that the pic is up I can take him out now. Right?
Speyside Offline
#23 Posted: Sat, Jul 23 2016, 6:46 PM EST
Joined: 03-16-2015
Posts: 13,106
MACS, your comment was very funny.
MACS Offline
#24 Posted: Sat, Jul 23 2016, 9:28 PM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
edin508 wrote:
BTW, now that the pic is up I can take him out now. Right?


Only if you mean "out to the gun range again".
tailgater Offline
#25 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 9:33 AM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
MACS wrote:
Only if you mean "out to the gun range again".


No. He meant out of his.. oh, nevermind.
teedubbya Offline
#26 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 9:38 AM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
His oh never mind must be sore by now.

What sort of a freak would actually go into a store and buy that thing anyway ?
MACS Offline
#27 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 9:43 AM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
tailgater wrote:
No. He meant out of his.. oh, nevermind.



Oh. Damn. Forgot about Mr. Fuzzbuster. I thought he meant eliminating Frank. d'oh!
teedubbya Offline
#28 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 9:44 AM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
You can't eliminate frank you can only hope to contain him
victor809 Offline
#29 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 11:54 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2011
Posts: 23,866
... Are you talking about putting things in your butt again?
teedubbya Offline
#30 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 12:05 PM EST
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
Yes
tailgater Offline
#31 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 5:39 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
TW may have purchased it, but at least he gets volume discounts.
frankj1 Offline
#32 Posted: Sun, Jul 24 2016, 8:03 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
teedubbya wrote:
You can't eliminate frank you can only hope to contain him

finally!



Abrignac Offline
#33 Posted: Mon, Jun 17 2019, 12:44 PM EST
Joined: 02-24-2012
Posts: 17,263
Where is fuzz hiding these days?
Whistlebritches Offline
#34 Posted: Mon, Jun 17 2019, 6:44 PM EST
Joined: 04-23-2006
Posts: 22,128
Abrignac wrote:
Where is fuzz hiding these days?



I heard he fell in love with Z...………..they're inseperable
frankj1 Offline
#35 Posted: Mon, Jun 17 2019, 9:55 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
I sent him back to tw...I couldn't listen to the crying anymore.
from both of 'em.
CelticBomber Offline
#36 Posted: Mon, Jun 17 2019, 10:59 PM EST
Joined: 05-03-2012
Posts: 6,786
frankj1 wrote:
I sent him back to tw...I couldn't listen to the crying anymore.
from both of 'em.


Lol By doing that you only stopped one from crying. The other will be posting in the Politics tab tomorrow.

Gonz
frankj1 Offline
#37 Posted: Mon, Jun 17 2019, 11:13 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
CelticBomber wrote:
Lol By doing that you only stopped one from crying. The other will be posting in the Politics tab tomorrow.

Gonz

crazy funny story...

so tw pm'd me after fuzzy arrived home. I guess enough time has passed that Tim would forgive me for sharing this...

I don't remember what I sent him, it might have been some Japanese whiskey he couldn't find in K.C. that his father liked, that sounds right. Don't remember anything else, but fuzzy rode shotgun.

For some reason, tw decided to open the box when his parents were there (his dear mother has since passed away, hence the time lag in telling this story) and he pulled out the zip lock/hazmat bag that contained the red headed, travel weary fuzzy. I guess some 'splainin' ensued...

I will never stop chuckling over tw writing about having to listen to his sweet, innocent mother saying the words "butt plug" over and over.
CelticBomber Offline
#38 Posted: Tue, Jun 18 2019, 12:09 AM EST
Joined: 05-03-2012
Posts: 6,786
frankj1 wrote:
crazy funny story...

so tw pm'd me after fuzzy arrived home. I guess enough time has passed that Tim would forgive me for sharing this...

I don't remember what I sent him, it might have been some Japanese whiskey he couldn't find in K.C. that his father liked, that sounds right. Don't remember anything else, but fuzzy rode shotgun.

For some reason, tw decided to open the box when his parents were there (his dear mother has since passed away, hence the time lag in telling this story) and he pulled out the zip lock/hazmat bag that contained the red headed, travel weary fuzzy. I guess some 'splainin' ensued...

I will never stop chuckling over tw writing about having to listen to his sweet, innocent mother saying the words "butt plug" over and over.



OMG I can see it in my head. I can hear someone sputtering..... it's a.... well.... it's like this..... I mean.... welll mom.... and in his head thinking FRANK!!!!!!! The fuuny thing is if that was me and my mom she would have just asked very loudly why is your"friend" (she would make the quotes signs with her hands and A LOT of sarcasm in her voice) sending you butt plugs? In a very serious way intentionally designed to cause me as much pain and embarrassment as possible for her amusement only. Which I would latter have to go home and take out on my cat(Code for my pen1s)


Rereading that paragraph... Yep just over the line enough for everyone else to go Umm yeah.... and for me to laugh like a hysterical baby!Applause
USNGunner Offline
#39 Posted: Tue, Jun 18 2019, 5:22 PM EST
Joined: 05-17-2019
Posts: 4,402
frankj1 wrote:
crazy funny story...

so tw pm'd me after fuzzy arrived home. I guess enough time has passed that Tim would forgive me for sharing this...

I don't remember what I sent him, it might have been some Japanese whiskey he couldn't find in K.C. that his father liked, that sounds right. Don't remember anything else, but fuzzy rode shotgun.

For some reason, tw decided to open the box when his parents were there (his dear mother has since passed away, hence the time lag in telling this story) and he pulled out the zip lock/hazmat bag that contained the red headed, travel weary fuzzy. I guess some 'splainin' ensued...

I will never stop chuckling over tw writing about having to listen to his sweet, innocent mother saying the words "butt plug" over and over.


Oh my Gawd! That is epic. I have a similar one that I had almost forgot.

When I was in my Special Boat Unit back in the mid 80's, I carried a huge rubber johnson in a custom made camouflaged LC-1 (web gear) pouch when I was on the aggressors (bad guys). It had started out as a Halloween costume when I went to a unit party as a flasher. UDT shorts on a tanned person are invisible. :)

So since I had the thing I had a pouch made and used it on ops. If I could get close enough to the boat to toss it in, that was a kill. It was a simulated grenade, thus the boat was "F@#(ed). I loved the symbology. BigGrin

Flash forward 10 years. I get married, my mother in law is a very staid old school Italian lady that simply loved giving me grief. So at Christmas that year, I put "Stiffy" in an old Kahlua gift can, nuts down, wrapped it up, labeled it "For Dorothy, From Santa" and slipped it unobserved under the Christmas tree.

Christmas morning, the entire collected families, and kids, are all around the tree opening gifts. We get to her, she's looking around trying to figure out who Santa is, unwraps it, looks in the can, confused for a moment, (the heads bobbing up and down) then clarity kicks in. She slams the lid shut, looks at me with daggers, starts to say something and all the kids start yelling, "What is it Grandma? What is it?"

I'm dying, nobody else knows, and she has to do a, "well just you kids never mind, it's private". And be nice until she can get me cornered later. I paid for that for years, but it was worth every damned second of it. :D

I loved that woman, she was finest kind, we had fun.
frankj1 Offline
#40 Posted: Tue, Jun 18 2019, 10:39 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2007
Posts: 44,215
excellent!
tailgater Offline
#41 Posted: Wed, Jun 19 2019, 8:16 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
The old Dilldo to the MIL trick.

Classic.
MACS Offline
#42 Posted: Sun, Jun 23 2019, 11:11 PM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
SBU guy? Yeah... he's a phag.
USNGunner Offline
#43 Posted: Mon, Jun 24 2019, 9:43 AM EST
Joined: 05-17-2019
Posts: 4,402
MACS wrote:
SBU guy? Yeah... he's a phag.


And your point is.............................................?

Beer
MACS Offline
#44 Posted: Mon, Jun 24 2019, 4:23 PM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,747
Just flippin you some shiite. I started as a boiler tech in 87. Switched to MA in 96 and retired as an MACS in '07.

Did a lot of time on Coronado. Short stint in NSWG. While I was on the USS Mobile Bay in '04 I rode a MK5 up whatever the hell that river's name is by Um Qasr... then deployed to Baghdad and Fallujah with Team 3 in '06. I got voluntold for that gig.
USNGunner Offline
#45 Posted: Mon, Jun 24 2019, 5:44 PM EST
Joined: 05-17-2019
Posts: 4,402
MACS wrote:
Just flippin you some shiite. I started as a boiler tech in 87. Switched to MA in 96 and retired as an MACS in '07.

Did a lot of time on Coronado. Short stint in NSWG. While I was on the USS Mobile Bay in '04 I rode a MK5 up whatever the hell that river's name is by Um Qasr... then deployed to Baghdad and Fallujah with Team 3 in '06. I got voluntold for that gig.


I figured that, so I was just flipping it back. I pulled the plug in 98. I was in XI, a riverinne unit up in Vallejo at the time. Mid 80's. Shore duty for a GMG at the time, and I spent more time deployed there than I did on a couple of sea tours. Spent a bunch of time dropping and picking up frogs. Good times.
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