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Last post 21 years ago by E-Chick. 8 replies replies.
Penguin
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Robby Offline
#1 Posted: Sun, May 4 2003, 11:44 AM EST
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
A penguin is driving down the road and all of a sudden hears a noise that doesn’t sound good. He pulls his little penguin car over in to a service station.

The guy says, this is going to take a few minutes. So the penguin waddles across the street to the 7-11 to get some ice cream. Penguins love ice cream. Since he doesn’t have hands though, he couldn’t hold the ice cream very well and he got it all over the place.

After finishing his ice cream, he waddled back over to the service station to enquire about his penguin car. The mechanic said, looks like you blew a seal.

And the penguin says, no, that’s just a little ice cream!
Penguin13 Offline
#2 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 4:50 AM EST
Joined: 07-26-2002
Posts: 1,546
LOL - It's funny you mention that. I have that exact joke pinned up on my board here at work :)

KC
E-Chick Offline
#3 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 7:02 AM EST
Joined: 06-15-2002
Posts: 4,877
Yeah, it's funny, but this is one that my hubby tells over and over...we need some new ones in this family...

Penguin13 Offline
#4 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 7:10 AM EST
Joined: 07-26-2002
Posts: 1,546
E - how bout this one:

A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up. While doing this the clerk spots two penguins sitting on the back seat of the car. He asks the driver, "What's up with the penguins in the back seat?" The man in the car says, "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them but, I haven't a clue." The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo." "Yeah, that's a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away. The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car. "Hey, they're still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo!" "Oh, I did," says the driver, "and we had a great time. Today I'm taking them to the beach."

KC
E-Chick Offline
#5 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 7:27 AM EST
Joined: 06-15-2002
Posts: 4,877
: )
Tobasco Offline
#6 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 7:57 AM EST
Joined: 02-08-2003
Posts: 2,809

I like both jokes! I think the 2nd one is a little funnier to me. ;>)

Mag
[email protected] Offline
#7 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 8:14 AM EST
Joined: 01-25-2002
Posts: 9,719
An 85-year-old man went to his doctor's office and while there the Dr. asked for a sperm count.

The doctor, perplexed to say the least, gave the man a jar and said:
"Take this jar home and bring back a **** sample tomorrow."

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

The doctor, trying to refrain from smiling, asked what happened and the man explained:

"Well, doc, it's like this - First I tried with my right hand, but nothing.
Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing.
She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still nothing.
We even called up Arlene, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing."

The doctor was nonetheless shocked and amazed to say the least and out of sheer inquisitive asked:
"You asked your neighbor?"

The old man replied: "Yep. And no matter what we tried, we still couldn't get the jar open."
[email protected] Offline
#8 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 8:19 AM EST
Joined: 01-25-2002
Posts: 9,719
Q: What one word could have saved Princess Diana's life?









A: Taxi.
E-Chick Offline
#9 Posted: Mon, May 5 2003, 8:43 AM EST
Joined: 06-15-2002
Posts: 4,877
LOL@thejar!

AHhhhhhh!!!! That really was funny!
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