America's #1 Online Cigar Auction
first, best, biggest!

Last post 20 years ago by Fatshotbud. 6 replies replies.
things never to say to a cop
Jump to Bottom | Previous Topic | Next Topic
kccody Offline
#1 Posted: Mon, Jun 23 2003, 4:48 PM EST
Joined: 03-19-2007
Posts: 610
NEVER SAY TO A COP
>
>1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
>
>2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
>
>
>
>3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
>
>4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
>
>5. Are You Andy or Barney?
>
>6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
>
>7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
>
>8. I pay your salary!
>
>9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
>
>
>
>10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
>
>11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other
>
>cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
>
>12. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyeslook glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
merlin9052 Offline
#2 Posted: Mon, Jun 23 2003, 5:17 PM EST
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
Those are funny,have seen them before.I know we have some bros. of the leaf that are some of our nation's finest and would love to hear some of the real excuses theyve heard from people.It usually makes for some entertaining reading!!LOL
Eric
chitownblackjack Offline
#3 Posted: Mon, Jun 23 2003, 6:49 PM EST
Joined: 07-07-2001
Posts: 8
LOL!

I was riding with a buddy of mine once who got popped for going through a 55 mph zone at 92 mph... when the cop asked for his license and registration, because it was in Indiana and the cop wore one of those fancy rimmed hats, my buddy said: "nice acorns, officer!".

No, it didn't help. The cop still gave him green stamps for going 92 in a 55, but to me it was still rather funny!
limoric Offline
#4 Posted: Mon, Jun 23 2003, 7:56 PM EST
Joined: 03-08-2001
Posts: 623
I was cruising down the road to pick up a c-bid order I missed at home when I got busted for running a yellow, I was also late for a soccer game I was coaching. As soon as the lights came on I reached for my whisle and put it around my neck. When the cop came up to the door, I said sorry officer I'm realy late picking up some kids for Soccer, I'm the Coach, it would be horrible if I ruin the game for them. He said get going then. To this day that whisle is in my cup holder.

Also heard of a guy flying down the freeway, I guess this guy speeds a lot and now carries a "Get out of Jail Fee" card from Monopoly, he keeps it in front of his license. He was going 120 KM in an 80 zone, when the cop took his licinse, he could stop laughing, he let the guy go.

OK last one. This insid sales rep I deal with was speeding down the highway between Edmonton and Calgary when he got stoped By the RCMP. when the cop got to the window he explained how he was late for a realy big meeting and how sorry he was and if he could do anything like buy tickets to the annual officers Ball. The cop said, "son officers don't have balls. When the cop reallized what he said, he laughed and let him go.
tailgater Offline
#5 Posted: Tue, Jun 24 2003, 1:41 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
Is Dudley Do-right still up there?
Eh?
jgjam Offline
#6 Posted: Tue, Jun 24 2003, 4:02 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
I still bust up laughing every time I watch the Chris Rock Police Training short "How to not get your a$$ kicked by the police"

This link has it posted for viewing (along with some really funny other stuff... my favorite is the Chipshot commercial).

http://www.allowe.com/h-video.htm

John
Fatshotbud Offline
#7 Posted: Wed, Jun 25 2003, 6:28 AM EST
Joined: 03-31-2003
Posts: 782
That is some funny stuff, beats the heck out of reading some of the other melodrama.
Users browsing this topic
Guest
Back to Top