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Last post 20 years ago by phenix007. 20 replies replies.
Texans vs Liberals
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tailgater Offline
#1 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 4:32 AM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
Subject: Liberals, Conservatives and Texans

Question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges.
You are carrying a Glock .40 and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?

Liberal Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun and what kind of message does this send to society and my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me or would he just be content to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion.

_____________________________

Conservative Answer:

BANG!



_____________________________

>Texan's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click... (sounds of reloading).

Wife: "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving, what do you kids think?"

Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it too..."

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click.

Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
eleltea Offline
#2 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 4:36 AM EST
Joined: 03-03-2002
Posts: 4,562
lmao. Can't wait for you-know-who's response.
RDC Offline
#3 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 4:39 AM EST
Joined: 01-21-2000
Posts: 5,874
LOL
mpingree Offline
#4 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 4:41 AM EST
Joined: 07-23-2003
Posts: 179
Hey us TEXANS resemble those remarks :)

They were actually hollow points !!
BDS Offline
#5 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 5:18 AM EST
Joined: 07-26-2002
Posts: 162
I would say you got ripped off, only 9 shots out of a Glock .40. Even here in CA we get a 10 round clip then 1 in the pipe, that gives us 11 shots.
timhampton Offline
#6 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 7:28 AM EST
Joined: 10-03-2003
Posts: 166
LMAO!!!! I must be a Texan at heart!!!!

Tim
GTofMurphy Offline
#7 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 7:40 AM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 341
Love Texas!

We don't have as much liberal BS here. I lived in both NY and CA before coming to Texas and they can’t compare. In Texas common sense is still the norm not the exception.

Texas:
No State income tax
We have the death penalty and use it
Republican are now in-charge of State Govt.
Affordable housing
Love football
Beautiful women
Wide open spaces
Great people
“Small town values” are still around
GT

RDC Offline
#8 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 7:48 AM EST
Joined: 01-21-2000
Posts: 5,874
and if licenced can conceal and carry!!!
Sylance Offline
#9 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 7:55 AM EST
Joined: 06-19-2003
Posts: 592
Hey, I'm in Arizona and we have some of that as well. With a permit you can carry concealed, but anyone can carry open. It's great. In fact, I have a CCW and carry all the time.

For me it would be:

Bang! Bang!...... Bang! No need to do more than that, wouldn't want to waste the ammo.
GTofMurphy Offline
#10 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 9:59 AM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 341
Here is another good one. In Texas you can use deadly force to protect you and your property. If someone enters your home to steal or do what ever you can shot them dead. None of these liberal excuses work:
He only had a knife you should have only wounded him.
He didn’t have a weapon.
He didn’t point his gun at you.
He wasn’t dangerous?
He was he trying to leave.
He should not have been killed for trying to take a stereo.
He didn’t understand English
He was high and drinking
He came from a broken home.

Those are all BS. They may fly in NY, CA of CT but they don’t fly in the Great State of Texas.
GT
phenix007 Offline
#11 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 10:07 AM EST
Joined: 10-20-2002
Posts: 245
To all of you NATURALIZED Texans...welcome....seems you adapt to our culture readily....Bait,beer and ammo...we've not been whipped yet...(Civil War doesn't count)..phenix
jdrabinski Offline
#12 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 12:24 PM EST
Joined: 08-16-2002
Posts: 794
phenix, the Alamo?

Maybe twice.
phenix007 Offline
#13 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 12:31 PM EST
Joined: 10-20-2002
Posts: 245
that was a battle not a war ...gotcha...but gave us a battle cry that helped to win the war....sorta like the term 9-11...phenix
BeatDragon Offline
#14 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 12:32 PM EST
Joined: 02-28-2003
Posts: 4,754
At least in Arnoldfornia we dont have "Dry Counties". Went see a Cowboys game a few years back and did the travel agent tell the Arnoldfornian's that Irving is in a dry county? Nooooooooooo. Had to drive to Arlington to get beers before we went to the Cowboys game!!! At least here we can just step over a few liberals passed out in front of the liquor store anywhere in the state!

And hey, havent you peole ever heard of hills! The only lump of dirt as far as the eye can see is a freakin overpass!

Sorry for the thread jack but I hadda defend my homeland state!
phenix007 Offline
#15 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 12:37 PM EST
Joined: 10-20-2002
Posts: 245
hey Beat..no need to defend CA.with me I really like it out there....Guadalupe Mts. in far West Texas are't too shabby...aroung Marathon...alas you are right about the few dry counties we still have...our embarassment ...relic from an older time ...thankfully going away..slowly....San Antonio where I live is anything BUT dry...thanks to the Spanish and German heritage (we keep the best parts of assimulated culture and throw the rest away)
GTofMurphy Offline
#16 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 12:40 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 341
We have heard of hills that's why we have a place called the "The Hill Country" which is the Austin area. Texas is a big State, some flat some not flat.

I agree about the "dry areas" but it's really not that big of a deal because "wet areas" are usually close by.
GT
Charlie Offline
#17 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 1:15 PM EST
Joined: 06-16-2002
Posts: 39,751
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

C
Homebrew Offline
#18 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 2:53 PM EST
Joined: 02-11-2003
Posts: 11,885
Damn,
In Arkansas, it's just BANG BANG, classic 2 shot. Ya'll must be poor shots in Texas.
Later
Dave (A.K.A. Homebrew)
P.S. Unless it's a three round burst, from the MP5.
tonester666 Offline
#19 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 6:25 PM EST
Joined: 05-07-2003
Posts: 1,324
I hate those dry areas. Last time I fished Lake Fork it was an awful long drive for beers.

Felt I should post this again.

THREE MEN ARE SITTIN' ON A BENCH. ONE'S A TEXAN
WEARING A STETSON, ONE'S A MUSLIM WEARING A TURBAN,
AND THE LAST AN APACHE WITH AN EAGLE FEATHER
WOVEN IN HIS HAIR. THE INDIAN IS RATHER GLUM AND SAYS
"ONCE MY PEOPLE WERE MANY, BUT NOW WE ARE FEW.
THE MUSLIM PUFFS UP AND SAYS "ONCE MY PEOPLE WERE FEW,
BUT NOW WE ARE MANY MILLIONS."
THE TEXAN ADJUSTS HIS HAT, FINISHES ROLLING A SMOKE,
LEANS BACK IN HIS CHAIR AND DRAWLS, "THAT'S CAUSE WE
AIN'T PLAYED COWBOYS AND MUSLIMS YET!"
tailgater Offline
#20 Posted: Wed, Oct 29 2003, 7:09 PM EST
Joined: 06-01-2000
Posts: 26,185
Phenix,
I was just in San Antonio two weeks ago.
What a GREAT city! That riverwalk is one of the best concentrations of bars/foods in America, at least if you like Mexican.
phenix007 Offline
#21 Posted: Fri, Oct 31 2003, 3:30 AM EST
Joined: 10-20-2002
Posts: 245
tailgater...glmad you enjoyed our little city...did you make it to the Havana Club for a little Herf???We have some pretty good cuisines other than Mexican here also...but most on the riverwalk being primarily tourists want Mexican...next time you should try LeReve considered by many as the best resturant in the state..also Bigas on the Bank...was there wed. nite..outstanding...just forget the chains ie Mortons,Palm,etc....let me know next time and I will direct you to the non-tourists great places in and about town...Phenix
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