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Last post 19 years ago by Liz62803. 23 replies replies.
What Would YOU Do?
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eleltea Offline
#1 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 7:48 AM EST
Joined: 03-03-2002
Posts: 4,562
An elephant with 3 balls. What do you do?
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Walk him and pitch to the rhino.
EI Offline
#2 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 7:53 AM EST
Joined: 06-29-2002
Posts: 5,069
how do you stop an elephant from stampeding






Cut off his stampeder
bloody spaniard Offline
#3 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 8:08 AM EST
Joined: 03-14-2003
Posts: 43,802
Q: How do you hunt for elephant?

A: Hide in a bush and make peanut sounds.
EI Offline
#4 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 8:14 AM EST
Joined: 06-29-2002
Posts: 5,069
How can ya tell if a female elephant in heat has been in your bed room








Your mattress is missing and there's a dime on your dresser
bloody spaniard Offline
#5 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 8:24 AM EST
Joined: 03-14-2003
Posts: 43,802
LOL!!!
Charlie Offline
#6 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 8:27 AM EST
Joined: 06-16-2002
Posts: 39,751
LOL, throw high and inside to the elephant to back him off the plate!

Charlie
THL Offline
#7 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 10:05 AM EST
Joined: 10-22-2002
Posts: 3,044
What do you get when you cross peanut butter with an elephant?








You get either peanut butter that never forgets, or an elephant that sticks to the roof of your mouth.
ryantp Offline
#8 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 10:21 AM EST
Joined: 11-23-2009
Posts: 4,567
How do you get an elephant into a tree?

Take the "F" out of "way".

Email me if you can't figure it out (ryantpederson at yahoo).
regdunlap7 Offline
#9 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 10:30 AM EST
Joined: 07-17-2003
Posts: 391
Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in a tree?











Pretty good hidders aren't they ;)
BeatDragon Offline
#10 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 10:38 AM EST
Joined: 02-28-2003
Posts: 4,754
What do elephants use for tampons...







Sheep
MACS Offline
#11 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 10:42 AM EST
Joined: 02-26-2004
Posts: 79,943
There's no f in way!! (i.e there is no F'ing way)

hehehehe pretty funny.

Thought i'd post this so those who are intellectually challenged don't have to e-mail Ryan. :-)
spadesman Offline
#12 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 11:47 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2003
Posts: 1,470
Why do elephants paint their toenails red?

So they case hide in a strawberry patch.




Why do elephants hide in strawberry patches?


So they can jump out an squash people.




Why do elephants stomp on people?

They like the squishy feeling between their toes
SirWolfgang Offline
#13 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 4:57 PM EST
Joined: 11-14-2004
Posts: 417
How are an elephant and a banana just alike?

They are both yellow
. . . . uh . . . .
Except for the elephant, of course.

-Wolfy
CWFoster Offline
#14 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 7:15 PM EST
Joined: 12-12-2003
Posts: 5,414
Okay, you people are gettin' too silly, so you deserve this!

How can you tell if an elephant's been in the referigerator?



















look for footprints in the butter dish!
ravio11i Offline
#15 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 9:09 PM EST
Joined: 10-01-2004
Posts: 22
oooh oooh oooh my turn.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinocerous???







elephino
thurson Offline
#16 Posted: Thu, Dec 9 2004, 11:25 PM EST
Joined: 06-26-2004
Posts: 3,919
How do you eat an elephant?









One bite at a time.
DrMaddVibe Offline
#17 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 2:17 AM EST
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,635
El...depends, is the elephant on steroids?
EI Offline
#18 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 6:00 AM EST
Joined: 06-29-2002
Posts: 5,069
whats gray and comes in gallons






not hard to guess after all of the above, now is it?
THL Offline
#19 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 6:05 AM EST
Joined: 10-22-2002
Posts: 3,044
What's the black stuff between an elephant's toes?







Slow running natives.
spadesman Offline
#20 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 6:38 AM EST
Joined: 10-14-2003
Posts: 1,470
ok, one more go...

What weighs 5,000 lbs and wears glass slippers?




Cinderelephant
nilro Offline
#21 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 9:54 AM EST
Joined: 10-30-2003
Posts: 20
Why don't elephants ride bicycles?


Because they don't have a thumb to ring the bell.
cexshun Offline
#22 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 10:04 AM EST
Joined: 09-23-2004
Posts: 1,289
Why do elephants wear tennies?


Because the elevenies are too big and the nineies are too small.
cexshun Offline
#23 Posted: Fri, Dec 10 2004, 10:10 AM EST
Joined: 09-23-2004
Posts: 1,289
Here's one a little more for the likes of you guys.

A man went to a doctor to have his **** enlarged. Well, this particular procedure involved splicing a baby elephant's trunk onto the man's ****.
Overjoyed, the man went out with his best girl to a very fancy restaurant. After cocktails, the man's **** crept out of his pants, felt around the table, grabbed a hard roll and quickly disappeared under the tablecloth. The girl was startled and exclaimed, "What was that?".
Suddenly the **** came back, took another hard roll and just as quickly disappeared. The girl was silent for a moment, then finally said, "I don't believe I saw what I think I just saw... can you do that again?"
With a bit of an uncomfortable smile the man replied, "Honey, I'd like to, but I don't think my ass can take another hard roll!"
Liz62803 Offline
#24 Posted: Sat, Dec 11 2004, 6:56 AM EST
Joined: 01-21-2004
Posts: 2,921
*google is my friend* lol

There was this guy who bought an elderly circus elephant; I don't know why. Alas, he couldn't afford to feed it. He'd never seen an elephant jump with all 4 feet off the ground. So he started a contest: entry was $10, and the first person to get the elephant to jump with all 4 feet off the ground would get $50,000.

All sorts of people tried, but nobody could get the elephant to jump. Finally, this little guy arrives in a limousine. He's carrying a baseball bat. He walks up to the elephant, swings the bat, and crunches the elephants balls pretty badly. Needless to say, the elephant jumps, and the owner pays out the $50,000. Unfortunately, the owner had barely collected enough to cover the prize, so he ran another contest. He'd never seen an elephant swing its head back and forth as if to say, "no." Same deal as before: $10 per entry, 50,000 prize. Lots of people try and fail.

Then the little guy shows up in his limousine again, pulls out his bat, and walks up to the elephant. He says, "Remember me?" The elephant nods yes. The man says holds up his bat and says, "Want me to use this again?" The elephant nods his head rather emphatically no....
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