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Last post 21 years ago by cruiser. 15 replies replies.
Dog Rocket Hell!
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Biker Offline
#1 Posted: Mon, Jul 29 2002, 5:48 PM EST
Joined: 07-12-2002
Posts: 20
Today I smoked the worst cigar I've ever smoked. A Dark Shark. Why didn't anyone warn a poor unsuspecting newby. I feel as if I put my lips to the sphincter of some bile-ridden pus laden fissure. AUUUGH!

First off, the dark oily wrapper is a bad die job on a dry candella. Two tokes and I feel as if I will never get this awfull bitter taste out of my mouth. I tried to was the taste away with the strongest peatiest single malt I know and that didn't work. I figured I would smoke a LGC maduro Series R to overpower my tastebuds and all I did was ruin the enjoyment of a great standby cigar.

I may never regain my taste sensations again. Don't go ther folks. Whoever makes this foul stogie is out to get you.

Be Ye Forewarned!
goldengoose7 Offline
#2 Posted: Mon, Jul 29 2002, 6:11 PM EST
Joined: 06-28-2002
Posts: 310
YIKES!

Sounds GASTLY! Thanks for the warning!
Biker Offline
#3 Posted: Mon, Jul 29 2002, 6:13 PM EST
Joined: 07-12-2002
Posts: 20
I guess there's a reason this one went for $8.00 for 5.

YechK!
Mr.Mean Offline
#4 Posted: Mon, Jul 29 2002, 6:23 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2001
Posts: 3,025
to rain on your parade, you paid too much. Purchased a five pack a year ago. I had little patience then and smoked three in a row trying to get a good one. Every one of them got the overhand toss.
emgjet Offline
#5 Posted: Mon, Jul 29 2002, 9:36 PM EST
Joined: 11-28-2001
Posts: 1,231
Biker: I too learned the hard way. Smoked one while I was cutting the lawn..I decided to throw them in as fertilizer.
jjohnson28 Offline
#6 Posted: Mon, Jul 29 2002, 9:50 PM EST
Joined: 09-12-2000
Posts: 7,914
Thanks guys! I got one as a Gift more than a year ago in a box pass.Course, I haven't had the guts to smoke it either,one day I will,albeit mostly for the experience.Looks like I won't have to hurry myself.LOL
wjskin Offline
#7 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 5:33 AM EST
Joined: 03-16-2002
Posts: 72
I'd like to add the Matasas and Monte Albar to the list. These were recent trials that were downright nasty. I also had a bundle of Biarritz Rothschilds that bought a couple of months ago, that were pretty green (*cough*cough*). Tried one recently after napping 'em and it wasn't as bad, but not very tasty, nonetheless.

Anybody like the Roly 2's as an everyday smoke? They seem to be a little inconsistent, but the good 'uns keep me taking my chances. Probably shouldn't have mentioned these in a "dog rocket" thread, so maybe I should end this post tying things back to it's origins.

Caleyes, anyone?
Charlie Offline
#8 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 5:41 AM EST
Joined: 06-16-2002
Posts: 39,751
Try as you may, you will not find a worse cigar than the Lone Crap, whoops Lone Wolf! Charlie
Biker Offline
#9 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 6:22 AM EST
Joined: 07-12-2002
Posts: 20
Well, I brushed my teeth 5 times since last night, scraped my tongue, even used shampoo as a mouthwash (got that trick from some website for women who smoke cigars and want fresh breath). Nothing helped.

My wife won't kiss me, my dog won't come near me and my pickup broke down.

Somebody shoot me!

Hey, aren't new guys supposed to send cigars to SteveS? He, He, He!
xibbumbero Offline
#10 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 7:09 AM EST
Joined: 01-25-2002
Posts: 12,535
Steve loves these,I hear tell. X
delarob Offline
#11 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 7:13 AM EST
Joined: 06-28-2001
Posts: 5,318
Try gasoline. It may not remove the taste...but whata rush!
SteveS Offline
#12 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 9:00 AM EST
Joined: 01-13-2002
Posts: 8,751
LMAO ... xibbumbero, here you are encouraging this poor guy to send Dark Sharks ... what've I ever done to you??? I do no more than remind newbies that they should send EACH of us a cigar and urge them like the ads on TV used to say, to send the very best ... biker, we've got a guy here who likes Lone Wolves ... being an animal lover, he probably also likes Dark Sharks ... send those to him. Send the rest of us each one good cigar, except X, whose cigar you should send to me ... X can do pennance for trying to play a dirty trick on you. And even though your 'welcome-me-to-the-board cigar hasn't arrived yet, welcome.
Biker Offline
#13 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 9:27 AM EST
Joined: 07-12-2002
Posts: 20
SteveS: Which do you want? An Ashton VSG or Partagas 150? Everyone else just put in your orders.

Oh, by the way, you all will have to stay off the auction site for a week or two so I can afford all these bribes(uh) Initiation dues/good will gestures. Let me know who the animal lover is who i can unload(uh) donate these fine(gak!) cigars on.
SteveS Offline
#14 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 9:52 AM EST
Joined: 01-13-2002
Posts: 8,751
Haven't had one of those VSGs in a while ... and, fyi, you won't have much problem bidding against me in the next few weeks ... not only have I overdone it a bit in the last few, I'm going on vacation in mid-month ... nice choice on the Ashton ... good cigar.
BMW Offline
#15 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 2:15 PM EST
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 3,010
Welcome Biker, I prefer Padrons as my newbie gift. Have you tried sucking on moth balls? They work on the Lone Wolfs! (Hope you gfot your pick up fixed, that sucks.) Barry
cruiser Offline
#16 Posted: Tue, Jul 30 2002, 2:25 PM EST
Joined: 06-15-2001
Posts: 739
Biker I would put a couple in your Exhaustpipe and see how far dogrockets can fly when you put the hammer on!
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