How the Internet Began
In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham
Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.
And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg.
Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com.
She said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why doth thou travel far from town
to town with thy goods when thou can trade without ever leaving thy tent?"
And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short
of a camel load, but simply said, "How, Dear?"
And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in
between to send messages saying what you have for sale and they will
reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be made
on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the
drums. The drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold
all the goods he had at the top price, without ever moving from his tent.
But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secret
himself inside Abraham's drum and was accused of insider trading. And the
young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take
to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican
Siderites, or NERDS for short.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the
deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were
going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up every
drum company in the land. And indeed did insist on making drums that would
work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.
Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by
others."
And as Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or as it came to be
known "eBay" he said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."
And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"YAHOO," said Abraham.
And that is how it all began.
