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Last post 10 years ago by wheelrite. 17 replies replies.
The ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER.....
DrafterX Offline
#1 Posted:
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,577
The ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER..... Think


This one is a little different....
Two Different Versions ...
Two Different Morals





OLD VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so the lazy bassard dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE OLD STORY: Be responsible for yourself!





MODERN VERSION


The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving..

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not EasyBeing Green ...'

Occupy the Anthill stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the SEIU group singing, We shall overcome.

Then Rev Al Sharpton's assistant has the group kneel down to pray for the grasshopper while he damns the ants. The Reverend Al can not attend as he has contractual commitments to appear on his MSNBC show for which he is paid over two million dollars a year to complain that rich people do not care.

President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush 43, President Bush 41, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus , and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight….

Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview on The View that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper , and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper .

The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and peaceful, neighborhood.

The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.





MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2014 and 2016.... Mellow





Think
bloody spaniard Offline
#2 Posted:
Joined: 03-14-2003
Posts: 43,802
DrafterX wrote:
The ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER..... Think

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2014 and 2016.... Mellow
Think

Hmmmmmm... dip things that make you go Think Think Think
sd72 Offline
#3 Posted:
Joined: 03-09-2011
Posts: 9,600
Is there somewhere we could make a donation to the grasshoppers family?
Brewha Offline
#4 Posted:
Joined: 01-25-2010
Posts: 12,201
This just in: the ant returned this afternoon with his home protection AK-47 and 12 triple clips. With 39 known dead at this hour, the growing list includes the grasshopper, the ants wife, the ants ant (?), the moth, the rabbit, the turtle, two text based bunnies, the pygmy marmoset, the slug, three little pigs, red riding hood, the cheeto, the sloth, an unamed ham sandwich, childhood guilt, the pistachio, captain flatulence, and a muffler bracket from a '79 pinto.

Charlton Heston immediately tweeted "Remember, guns don't kill people. Apes with guns kill people."

Film at 11.
ZRX1200 Offline
#5 Posted:
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 60,656
MAGAZINES G**DAMNIT MAGAZINES


clips are for your hair.
bloody spaniard Offline
#6 Posted:
Joined: 03-14-2003
Posts: 43,802
magazines like Boy's Life?whip
Brewha Offline
#7 Posted:
Joined: 01-25-2010
Posts: 12,201
The irony here is that captain flatulence could have prevented it all, but he was denied a conceal and carry permit because they thought the muzzle flash might cause an explosion . . .
I blame broccoli.
DrafterX Offline
#8 Posted:
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,577
Brewha wrote:

I blame broccoli.


Bush hated broccoli too... Mellow

Think
see, you guys have somethin in common afterall.... Mellow
Brewha Offline
#9 Posted:
Joined: 01-25-2010
Posts: 12,201
Sick
wheelrite Offline
#10 Posted:
Joined: 11-01-2006
Posts: 50,119
[quote=Brewha] I am a Compassionate Commie !


oh my...


wheel,
DrafterX Offline
#11 Posted:
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,577
Brewha wrote:
Sickamp;



Laugh
Brewha Offline
#12 Posted:
Joined: 01-25-2010
Posts: 12,201
wheelrite wrote:
[quote=Brewha] I am a Compassionate Commie !


oh my...


wheel,

We all like you Bill. And we all hope you get past this whole low "T" thing and get back to the quality banter and repartee we have come to expect from your Wheel And Pedro logins.

Take the pills. And god's speed my brother.
wheelrite Offline
#13 Posted:
Joined: 11-01-2006
Posts: 50,119
Brewha wrote:
We all like you Bill. And we all hope you get past this whole low "T" thing and get back to the quality banter and repartee we have come to expect from your Wheel And Pedro logins.

Take the pills. And god's speed my brother.


Thanks Bro !

Btw,
Funny you should mention the "T" thing. I had a physical recently and had it checked. My Doc said I have the "T" level of a 25yr old, no chit,,,,
That explains the perpetual boner,,,

#2,
I really am not Pedro,,,
no chit,,,,


wheel,
Brewha Offline
#14 Posted:
Joined: 01-25-2010
Posts: 12,201
wheelrite wrote:
Thanks Bro !

Btw,
Funny you should mention the "T" thing. I had a physical recently and had it checked. My Doc said I have the "T" level of a 25yr old, no chit,,,,
That explains the perpetual boner,,,

#2,
I really am not Pedro,,,
no chit,,,,


wheel,

Must be great to have the "T" of a man a third your age.
JK

Btw, do you know why you should hold up a one iron if there is a lighting storm?
Because even god can't hit a one iron . . . .
wheelrite Offline
#15 Posted:
Joined: 11-01-2006
Posts: 50,119
Brewha wrote:
Must be great to have the "T" of a man a third your age.
JK

Btw, do you know why you should carry a one iron if there is a lighting storm?
Because even god can't hit a one iron . . . .


Do you Golf Bro ?

If so,
You should come and play a round with our group once our season starts in March. You could attend as my guest


wheel,
Brewha Offline
#16 Posted:
Joined: 01-25-2010
Posts: 12,201
wheelrite wrote:
Do you Golf Bro ?

If so,
You should come and play a round with our group once our season starts in March. You could attend as my guest


wheel,

That's mighty nice of you.

If you and your buds a low handicappers we would have to play a best ball scramble - I spend more time in the trees than the squirrels do.

Anyway, it sound like fun. I'll buy the beer.
wheelrite Offline
#17 Posted:
Joined: 11-01-2006
Posts: 50,119
Brewha wrote:
That's mighty nice of you.

If you and your buds a low handicappers we would have to play a best ball scramble - I spend more time in the trees than the squirrels do.

Anyway, it sound like fun. I'll buy the beer.


Cool Bro,,,

We have single digit handicap guys to 20+ ....

I aint saying which one I am....

Our Club has 100+ members and have a scheduled course every sunday. March thru Oct.
I would love for you to play,,,

wheel..
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