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Last post 8 years ago by Gene363. 13 replies replies.
Bill & Hillary out for a jog.
Buckwheat Offline
#1 Posted:
Joined: 04-15-2004
Posts: 12,251
Bill Clinton started jogging near his new home in Chappaqua.

But on each run he happened to jog past a hooker standing on the same street corner, day after day.

With some apprehension he would brace himself as he approached her for what was most certainly to follow.

"Fifty dollars!" she would cry out from the curb.

"No, Five dollars!" fired back Clinton

This ritual between Bill and the hooker continued for days.

He'd run by and she'd yell, "Fifty dollars!"

And he'd yell back, "Five dollars!"

One day however, Hillary decided that she wanted to accompany her husband on his jog!

As the jogging couple neared the problematic street corner, Bill realized the "pro" would bark her $50 offer and Hillary would
wonder what he'd really been doing on all his past outings.

He realized he should have a darn good explanation for the Secretary of State.

As they jogged into the turn that would take them past the corner, Bill became even more apprehensive than usual.

Sure enough, there was the hooker!

Bill tried to avoid the prostitute's eyes as she watched the pair jog past.

Then, from the sidewalk, the hooker yelled...
.
.
.
.
See what you get for five bucks!?" Beer
TMCTLT Offline
#2 Posted:
Joined: 11-22-2007
Posts: 19,733
LOL Julian. Poor Skankles....
DrafterX Offline
#3 Posted:
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,555
Laugh
cacman Offline
#4 Posted:
Joined: 07-03-2010
Posts: 12,216
Buckwheat wrote:

See what you get for five bucks!?" Beer

LMFAO!!!!

Wonder how much Monica cost him? My guess is more than 5 bucks…
jetblasted Offline
#5 Posted:
Joined: 08-30-2004
Posts: 42,595
That was funny.

Prostitutes are known as hooker's, given the name to them by the frequency they were visited by the esteemed & honorable Union General Joseph Hooker, who was well known for his love of whiskey & prostitues.
DrafterX Offline
#6 Posted:
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,555
Did he beat them and burn their food stores..?? Huh
ZRX1200 Offline
#7 Posted:
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 60,617
I got a $5 on it
Gene363 Offline
#8 Posted:
Joined: 01-24-2003
Posts: 30,822
Applause Applause Applause
teedubbya Offline
#9 Posted:
Joined: 08-14-2003
Posts: 95,637
jetblasted wrote:
That was funny.

Prostitutes are known as hooker's, given the name to them by the frequency they were visited by the esteemed & honorable Union General Joseph Hooker, who was well known for his love of whiskey & prostitues.




According to this myth, there were so many prostitutes working around Union General Joseph Hooker’s army that they became known as “Hooker’s Division” or “Hooker’s Brigade” or simply “hookers.” The New Partridge Dictionary of Slang calls this story “popular fiction.”

The fly in the ointment is that the term was in use before the Civil War. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, this word had its origins as early as 1567 when it meant petty thief or pickpocket. (Other definitions include a person who fastened his clothing with hooks, like the Amish, a two-masted Dutch finishing vessel, and a rugby player, but we’ll ignore those.)

In America this synonym for prostitute dates back at least as far as 1845. It probably evolved from the conventional sense of hook, to lure and take or rob, qualities associated with prostitutes. John Bartlett’s Dictionary of Americanisms of 1859 defines a hooker as a strumpet and says it comes from the New York neighborhood known as Corlear’s Hook, where there were lots of prostitutes. That’s probably another myth.

Since “hooker” already meant prostitute by the time of the Civil War, it was an obvious joke to refer to the prostitutes around General Hooker’s army as Hooker’s Brigade.
Thunder.Gerbil Offline
#10 Posted:
Joined: 11-02-2006
Posts: 121,359
Knock it off TW. Shouldn't you be out burning southern food stores and salting crop fields rather than trying to educate people?
Buckwheat Offline
#11 Posted:
Joined: 04-15-2004
Posts: 12,251
Since this thread went off the tracks here is a BONUS JOKE


A woman goes to the Doctor worried about her husband's
temper.
The Doctor asks, "What's the problem?"
The woman says,
"Doctor, I don't know what to
do
Every day my husband seems to lose his
temper for no reason. It scares me.
The Doctor says, "I have a cure for that.
When it seems that your husband is getting angry,
just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth.
Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he
either
leaves the room or calms down."
Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor,
looking fresh and reborn.
The woman says, "Doctor that was a brilliant idea!
Every time my husband started losing it, I swished with water.
I swished and swished, and he calmed right down!
How does a glass of water do that?"

The Doctor says, "The water itself does nothing. It's
keeping your mouth shut that does the trick."

w:d/
DrafterX Offline
#12 Posted:
Joined: 10-18-2005
Posts: 98,555
Laugh
Gene363 Offline
#13 Posted:
Joined: 01-24-2003
Posts: 30,822
Buckwheat wrote:
Since this thread went off the tracks here is a BONUS JOKE


A woman goes to the Doctor worried about her husband's
temper.
The Doctor asks, "What's the problem?"
The woman says,
"Doctor, I don't know what to
do
Every day my husband seems to lose his
temper for no reason. It scares me.
The Doctor says, "I have a cure for that.
When it seems that your husband is getting angry,
just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth.
Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he
either
leaves the room or calms down."
Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor,
looking fresh and reborn.
The woman says, "Doctor that was a brilliant idea!
Every time my husband started losing it, I swished with water.
I swished and swished, and he calmed right down!
How does a glass of water do that?"

The Doctor says, "The water itself does nothing. It's
keeping your mouth shut that does the trick."

w:d/


LOL!

It works online too, but instead of drinking, you have them hold the glass with both hands. Beer
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