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Last post 20 years ago by calavera. 1 reply replies.
The Lion Tamer (Joke)
Gene363 Offline
#1 Posted:
Joined: 01-24-2003
Posts: 30,881
A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two people show up. One is a good looking older man in his mid-sixties and the other is a gorgeous blonde in her mid-twenties.

The circus owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you guys better be good or you're history. Here's your equipment -- chair, whip and a gun. Who wants to try out first?"

The girl says, "I'll go first." She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion's cage. The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her.

About half way there, she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body. The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her feet and ankles. He continues to lick and kiss her entire body for several minutes and then rests his head at her feet.

The circus owner's mouth is on the floor.

He says, "I've never seen a display like that in my life." He then turns to the older man and asks, "Can you top that?"

The older man replies, "No problem, just get that lion out of the way."
calavera Offline
#2 Posted:
Joined: 01-26-2002
Posts: 1,868
A man looks out his kitchen window one day and sees a large gorilla in a tree in his back yard. He calls the police and they put him in touch with a circus that is in town. The guy from the circus tells him that he will be there in a couple of minutes and to stay away from the gorilla as it is ferocious and has already killed several people.

The circus guy shows up and gets out of his truck with a sharp pointed stick, a large net, a chihuahua and a shotgun. The man of the house stares at him and asks him what the deal is with the odd assortment of items.

The circus guy says "Here is the plan. I climb the tree and poke the gorilla with the sharp stick. The gorilla will become enraged and let go of the branch to attack me. When he lets go, he will fall out of the tree. Then Fang here (points at the chihuahua) will run over and clamp on to his nuts. That is when you throw the net over his head."

The man says that he thinks that the plan is crazy, but the circus guy assures him that he has done it several times in the past. The man then asks him what the shotgun is for.

"Well," says the circus guy "There is always the chance that when I go to poke the gorilla, I will miss and I will fall out of the tree. If that happens, you take that shotgun and shoot Fang as quick as you can."

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