QMPASH wrote:Rocky Patel R4
I decide to smoke a RP R4 in the parking garage near where I work. Pulling the cigar from its cellophane jail, I swear I have seen this cigar before. Finally, it comes to me…it is just the same as the Cuban Cohibas I bought from the guy walking the beach in Cancun last summer. A squeeze reveals a spongy construction, much like a contraceptive sponge prior to insertion. The pre-light draw is a taste to remember…it’s what I imagine sucking powdered goat dung through a straw made of petrified moose sh*t might taste like. I contemplate quitting but decide that if I can have a root canal with no anesthesia, I can smoke this cigar.
As I toast the end of the stick, the way the Killing Fields of Cambodia must have smelled is the only thing that comes to my mind. All the pain and torture that must have been endured there seems only slightly worse than the experience I am suffering. The first draw fills my mouth with smoke that would be better suited for a fire at a tire factory, but I press on, knowing that I must find some answers. My head begins to pound like a headboard in a Ginger Lynn movie, but I puff again, trying to keep the smoke in and the bile down. The cigar is burning sideways and fast, and finally I can take no more. I see a homeless man walking by in his filthy clothes, and I ask him to spit in my mouth to take away the taste of the R4. He obliges and the stale taste of bad wine and cheap cigarettes is a welcome change. I offer him the remainder of the cigar as a reward for his kind gesture, and he slugs me square in the mouth. The mixture of my own blood and the Mogden David remain with me."
(I just thought that some of you guys who might not have read this already, might enjoy it.)
While I understand you aren't claiming to be the author of the review, aside from changing the name of the cigar in the review to R4, the above review was plagiarized word for word from something a good friend of mine wrote on CS back in early 2005 about the Tamborill.
As for the R4... meh. Split a bundle of them with bsevern back when they first came out around '07, for the $1.25-ish per cigar that we paid they were ok, but not something either of us ever bought or smoked again.