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Last post 3 months ago by Palama. 46 replies replies.
Cain Daytona
Magwitch Offline
#1 Posted:
Joined: 03-26-2010
Posts: 47
I typically spend New Year's eve gorging on a double order of General Tso's chicken, working though a bottle of Absolut and coaxing the wife into a little kneel and bob. This year she demanded we "be social" and go across the street to the H's for their New Year's eve party. I've always hated them. Crunchy phony types who drive Subarus with "World Peace" and "Coexist" bumper stickers. Worst of all, she said I couldn't get liquored up first. She was watching me like an ugly old hawk as we got ready. I was at least able to sneak a long pull on a bottle of Robitussin in the bathroom after dropping a deuce.

The party proved to be as bad as expected. Chubby middle-aged guys in sweaters with wives who've given up on trying to appear feminine. Wife introduced me to one of the women. I swear to God she had sideburns (and no doubt a thick black pelt that went up to her belly button and half way down her thigh). After four quick glasses of wine I looked for the bathroom. Mrs. H sent me upstairs as the ones downstairs were occupied. It was peaceful up there. After taking a leak I decided to see if there was anything of interest in the medicine cabinet. Score! Lorazapam, Xanax and Oxycodone. I took one of each and put a few more in my pocket. The H's have a hot 19 yr old daughter. Volleyball player. Walking past her room I noticed an overflowing hamper of dirty clothes. After a quick look around I darted in and snagged a pair of panties sitting temptingly on top of the pile. I took a deep and musky whiff before tucking them into my sock.

I was feeling better as I rejoined the party. Wife was having a good time so I wandered into the kitchen. One of the caterers was a cute Mexican girl. I watched her as she was cutting vegetables. The buttons of her white shirt were straining to hold in her sweet brown and massive jugs. I learned a little Spanish in prison so I started chatting her up. Not sure what I was thinking but I said "Quiero lamedura su cuello. Diez dolores?" which roughly translated means I want to lick your neck and I'll give you ten bucks. She gave me a puzzled look but then motioned me into an adjoining room. Sure enough, she opened her shirt a bit, tilted her head back and offered it up. I think it was the drugs because it was as if I floated to the ceiling and watched myself drag my tongue across her neck and down to her cleavage. I almost stiffed her but decided to give her the ten. She giggled and went back to vegetable cutting. The rest of the night I was pretty much catatonic. After midnight and all that nonsense we mercifully headed home. Wife even bobbed for me. I pretty much always pretend she's somebody else. Last night I imagined the Mexican. After the old hag started snoring I went out to the front yard and had a Cain Daytona to ring in 2013. Between puffs I took whiffs of the panties. It was a nice combination. I wonder if anyone else has tried it. Love you guys and Happy New Year!
Russ622 Offline
#2 Posted:
Joined: 09-22-2012
Posts: 477
Great review. Gonna go see if I can score some.

LOL LOL LOL LOL
dubleuhb Offline
#3 Posted:
Joined: 03-20-2011
Posts: 11,350
Cain Daytona, yes. 19 year old volleyball players panties, no, but hell I ain't dead yet so you never know.

Thanks for another episode into the life of Magwitch,
Rut-Ro! Offline
#4 Posted:
Joined: 01-16-2010
Posts: 1,991
Not talking
critter2 Offline
#5 Posted:
Joined: 11-02-2007
Posts: 6,110
those particular panties and a cain daytona? hmmmmmmmm, probably not, don't smoke many cains
okduckslayer Offline
#6 Posted:
Joined: 11-07-2008
Posts: 1,115
Applause
m j toal Offline
#7 Posted:
Joined: 03-06-2009
Posts: 3,149
Happy New Year Mags.

As usual, great review.

Glad to see you got a little spice in the last third.
ZRX1200 Offline
#8 Posted:
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 49,576
#4 daytona is my favorite.


Volleyball shorts are my favorite too.


You never did send you retarded sister over to my place you indian giver.........and I can't believe you didn't leave a upper decker in to can. Again.


*tisk tisk*
King Offline
#9 Posted:
Joined: 07-29-2012
Posts: 2,113
Applause

Best review I've ever read hands down!!!
edin508 Offline
#10 Posted:
Joined: 06-19-2012
Posts: 4,598
LOL LOL
King Offline
#11 Posted:
Joined: 07-29-2012
Posts: 2,113
I couldn't stop thinking about this all night... Was this a true story or you pulling my leg? LOL!

This should be published man. LOL!
Campage Offline
#12 Posted:
Joined: 06-22-2012
Posts: 6,283
LMFAO.
So good. This was maybe funnier then that story here about cooper meeting at the Applebee's.

Made my morning
sd72 Offline
#13 Posted:
Joined: 03-09-2011
Posts: 9,599
Modern classic.
Campage Offline
#14 Posted:
Joined: 06-22-2012
Posts: 6,283
Yes it is.

Makes me say Hemingway who?
hill5673 Offline
#15 Posted:
Joined: 06-25-2012
Posts: 1,402
Hey Jacka$$, stay out of my medicine cabinet !




And by the way, I don't have a daughter.... LOL
nolen Offline
#16 Posted:
Joined: 09-05-2012
Posts: 1,065
I snorted coffee all over my computer screen ya bastid :)
a412724 Offline
#17 Posted:
Joined: 04-22-2012
Posts: 72

the 6"x44 Corona tasted the best to me. excellent smoke.
hnixon12 Offline
#18 Posted:
Joined: 04-20-2009
Posts: 2,462
Magwitch wrote:
I typically spend New Year's eve gorging on a double order of General Tso's chicken, working though a bottle of Absolut and coaxing the wife into a little kneel and bob. This year she demanded we "be social" and go across the street to the H's for their New Year's eve party. I've always hated them. Crunchy phony types who drive Subarus with "World Peace" and "Coexist" bumper stickers. Worst of all, she said I couldn't get liquored up first. She was watching me like an ugly old hawk as we got ready. I was at least able to sneak a long pull on a bottle of Robitussin in the bathroom after dropping a deuce.

The party proved to be as bad as expected. Chubby middle-aged guys in sweaters with wives who've given up on trying to appear feminine. Wife introduced me to one of the women. I swear to God she had sideburns (and no doubt a thick black pelt that went up to her belly button and half way down her thigh). After four quick glasses of wine I looked for the bathroom. Mrs. H sent me upstairs as the ones downstairs were occupied. It was peaceful up there. After taking a leak I decided to see if there was anything of interest in the medicine cabinet. Score! Lorazapam, Xanax and Oxycodone. I took one of each and put a few more in my pocket. The H's have a hot 19 yr old daughter. Volleyball player. Walking past her room I noticed an overflowing hamper of dirty clothes. After a quick look around I darted in and snagged a pair of panties sitting temptingly on top of the pile. I took a deep and musky whiff before tucking them into my sock.

I was feeling better as I rejoined the party. Wife was having a good time so I wandered into the kitchen. One of the caterers was a cute Mexican girl. I watched her as she was cutting vegetables. The buttons of her white shirt were straining to hold in her sweet brown and massive jugs. I learned a little Spanish in prison so I started chatting her up. Not sure what I was thinking but I said "Quiero lamedura su cuello. Diez dolores?" which roughly translated means I want to lick your neck and I'll give you ten bucks. She gave me a puzzled look but then motioned me into an adjoining room. Sure enough, she opened her shirt a bit, tilted her head back and offered it up. I think it was the drugs because it was as if I floated to the ceiling and watched myself drag my tongue across her neck and down to her cleavage. I almost stiffed her but decided to give her the ten. She giggled and went back to vegetable cutting. The rest of the night I was pretty much catatonic. After midnight and all that nonsense we mercifully headed home. Wife even bobbed for me. I pretty much always pretend she's somebody else. Last night I imagined the Mexican. After the old hag started snoring I went out to the front yard and had a Cain Daytona to ring in 2013. Between puffs I took whiffs of the panties. It was a nice combination. I wonder if anyone else has tried it. Love you guys and Happy New Year!


Magwitch, why didnt you entitle this "My News Eve"??
JKilburn Offline
#19 Posted:
Joined: 10-19-2011
Posts: 1,437
Campage wrote:
LMFAO.
So good. This was maybe funnier then that story here about cooper meeting at the Applebee's.

Made my morning

I can't find the Applebee's story. I've read that classic and need to share with the masses.
jimbud Offline
#20 Posted:
Joined: 12-18-2009
Posts: 3,943
They pulled that thread.
LetsRock Offline
#21 Posted:
Joined: 01-23-2012
Posts: 4,594
Out of all the things going on in that story you decided on Cain Daytona as the title of this thread? I guess it is a cigar site so that makes sense now.
sd72 Offline
#22 Posted:
Joined: 03-09-2011
Posts: 9,599
Don't question genius. Just say thank you, and hope for more.

Thank you magwitch.
dstieger Offline
#23 Posted:
Joined: 06-22-2007
Posts: 10,336
May not be the pairing that Sam was shooting for....but wth....smoke and sniff what you like
DAD300 Offline
#24 Posted:
Joined: 12-08-2011
Posts: 109
sic bastad....great story!
whtwtrman79 Offline
#25 Posted:
Joined: 07-23-2012
Posts: 2,319
Lmao
billyboy03 Offline
#26 Posted:
Joined: 04-15-2012
Posts: 849
best review ever ( thinking to myself,at least I am not the only one who thinks this way.)Applause Applause Applause
jnichols Offline
#27 Posted:
Joined: 07-27-2012
Posts: 5,404
Applause Applause Applause
JadeRose Offline
#28 Posted:
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 17,570
Good to see ya, Mags. Glad life is treating you well.
chswrst726 Offline
#29 Posted:
Joined: 11-02-2012
Posts: 743
a412724 wrote:
the 6"x44 Corona tasted the best to me. excellent smoke.


They make panties in corona size? Looking at my wife's dresser, I assumed they only came in double toro.
Campage Offline
#30 Posted:
Joined: 06-22-2012
Posts: 6,283
I have a patite lancero banana hammock.
JadeRose Offline
#31 Posted:
Joined: 05-15-2008
Posts: 17,570
back to the top with Mags
crgcpro Offline
#32 Posted:
Joined: 04-27-2012
Posts: 7,751
Did anyone save the one that got yanked? It wasn't the Applebee's it was another one.
sd72 Offline
#33 Posted:
Joined: 03-09-2011
Posts: 9,599
Need some cains.
kombat96 Offline
#34 Posted:
Joined: 04-12-2010
Posts: 9,345
ZRX1200 wrote:
#4 daytona is my favorite.


Volleyball shorts are my favorite too.


You never did send you retarded sister over to my place you indian giver.........and I can't believe you didn't leave a upper decker in to can. Again.


*tisk tisk*



Agree with Jamie, #4, is the best vitola
ZRX1200 Offline
#35 Posted:
Joined: 07-08-2007
Posts: 49,576
Never did get to play with his sister.
hnixon12 Offline
#36 Posted:
Joined: 04-20-2009
Posts: 2,462
i like the Cain line, but just dont like the Daytona, i want to, but does nothing for me
smokestaxx Offline
#37 Posted:
Joined: 01-27-2012
Posts: 4,183
Luv me a Cain Daytona
danmdevries Offline
#38 Posted:
Joined: 02-11-2014
Posts: 10,930
Lol. This is terribly great.
crgcpro Offline
#39 Posted:
Joined: 04-27-2012
Posts: 7,751
Did Magwich get the ban hammer over Cooper and the Applebee's story?
KingoftheCove Offline
#40 Posted:
Joined: 10-08-2011
Posts: 5,471
I don't think so....
from what I gather, he made the wrong comments, about the wrong people............and "the Queen" lowered the ban hammer in a mighty fashion.....

but, I could be wrong..............
dharbolt Offline
#41 Posted:
Joined: 08-03-2013
Posts: 6,924
this is great
vanzandt Offline
#42 Posted:
Joined: 05-04-2008
Posts: 1,121
This guy is terrific..awesome
gae9jang2j Offline
#43 Posted:
Joined: 12-13-2012
Posts: 5,612
classic for the n00ds
Abrignac Offline
#44 Posted:
Joined: 02-24-2012
Posts: 14,381
Another gem from days past.
bgz Offline
#45 Posted:
Joined: 07-29-2014
Posts: 7,258
LMFAO,

Had to look up Magwitch, this is what Google served me.

Awesome, what happened to this guy?
Palama Offline
#46 Posted:
Joined: 02-05-2013
Posts: 11,949
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