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Last post 21 years ago by jgjam. 16 replies replies.
What would be the appropriate cigar to smoke?
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jgjam Offline
#1 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 5:16 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
I need to fire a guy at work tomorrow morning and was wondering what would be the appropriate cigar to smoke at lunch to celebrate the event.

John
RICKAMAVEN Offline
#2 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 5:26 PM EST
Joined: 10-01-2000
Posts: 33,248
first we will need to know why he is being fired. from that we may be able to understand your celebration and possibly assist you in the selection.

you don't ask easy questions?
jgjam Offline
#3 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 5:36 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
Took the poor b@st@rd in with an aquisition about 6 months ago. I believe the previous owner of the business had transfered him to the location about 4 months before we aquired it in order for us to do his "dirty work" in getting rid of him. He had worked for him about 15 years. But the guy is just a total pr@ck. Tried to help him fit in but he has fought it every step of the way and has a huge chip on his shoulder for the previous owner that also gets in the way. Since he was left in charge of the location his attitude has affected the staff morale and the location performance is such that I would have to close it up and put others out of work if I don't fire this guy quickly and turn it around. Normally I don't relish having to fire someone, but this a@@h@le really deserves it... hell I would of fired him 4 months ago except we gave him a damned employment contract... what fools we were.

John
jdrabinski Offline
#4 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 5:50 PM EST
Joined: 08-16-2002
Posts: 794
I'd suggest a Fuente Hemingway Signature, what with you signing his walking papers and all that.

Follow that with an Oliva 'O' Orion Torpedo, as you torpedo his already sinking ship.

Cap it all off with an Onyx Reserve Mini Belicoso as you watch the little man waddle away in shame.

Get a theme and go with it.

My thoughts, anyway.

John
osage Offline
#5 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 6:15 PM EST
Joined: 02-18-2001
Posts: 492
How about a Bad Frog! You are going to have a bad taste in your mouth anyway.
xrundog Offline
#6 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 6:42 PM EST
Joined: 01-17-2002
Posts: 2,212
In this situation I believe that you will feel empowered and dynamic. You should smoke a cigar that is powerful and dynamic. I suggest the Padron 3000 Maduro. Savor the complex flavors and perfect construction as you contemplate how this single action will affect thousands of lives and make the world a better place!
Tobasco Offline
#7 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 7:09 PM EST
Joined: 02-08-2003
Posts: 2,809
jdrabinski, that was damn funny!! Hehehe!

Mag
SteveS Offline
#8 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 7:22 PM EST
Joined: 01-13-2002
Posts: 8,751
Best to pick a good cigar that you like a lot ... it's been my experience that firing someone, even someone who richly deserves it, is generally a distasteful experience. Take care of business, then go for a decent lunch followed by a good cigar ... don't dwell on the issues of the past, but focus instead on the potential of the future and the plan of action your actions have launched to realize that potential.
Mr.Mean Offline
#9 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 7:29 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2001
Posts: 3,025
Simple. Bucanero Full Sail as you watch him walk the plank and Sail off to better days.

Aaaarrrrgghhh!
rayder1 Offline
#10 Posted: Thu, Feb 13 2003, 9:53 PM EST
Joined: 06-02-2002
Posts: 2,226
I like the full sail idea. Make sure you can see his hands all the time while you let him go.

Be honest and let him know exactly why he is being fired. Offer him a Lone Wolf as a parting gift.
smithbw Offline
#11 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 1:21 AM EST
Joined: 09-01-2001
Posts: 2,444
jgjamm this message disturbs me personally and professionally. I have had the displeasure of letting people go before and can't recall a reason to celebrate their departures even with the firing of the absolute worst $$heeez Head. I have and never will celebrate the bad fortune of firing a person. I still have the human factor as my number one concern.

If it was me I would reflect on what I could have done better as a manager to motivate this person to do their job - better. I believe that is management's responsibility. With that said, I know that there are a small handful of people that resist change and management directive and will never be a contributor to the team but still...Celebrating firing a person - Simply can't and won't do that!!!

As for the cigar that I would chose to smoke after firing a person it would have to be one that would provide me with the solace and reassurance that I made the right choice for the good of the organization.

A Montecristo Number 2 Havana!

Regards,


B

Robby Offline
#12 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 5:25 AM EST
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
You guys have it all wrong: Cuban Parejo Galaxia - World's Largest Cigar

That way, if he goes quietly, you could fire up and enjoy the rest of the afternoon. If not, you could either use it as a suppository or a club to pursuade the rapid departure of said derelict. Nothing says you really screwed up like a 10 x 100 ring in the right place... (so I hear) [NOT that there's anything wrong wiht that]
octowings Offline
#13 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 5:44 AM EST
Joined: 10-22-2002
Posts: 390
Go with the Fuente Short Story.

You'll Be Able To:
-Fire the jacka$$
-Have an incredible smoke
-Then get back to the office
and file the paperwork with H.R.
and be done with it.

Make it short & sweet! How better
to do it then with a Short Story!

...octo
Charlie Offline
#14 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 6:56 AM EST
Joined: 06-16-2002
Posts: 39,751
Have never in my life fired anyone and enjoyed it, no matter the reason....always feel bad, so I do not know if I could advise as to a cigar appropriate to the situation!

Maybe a La Gloria or Padron...certainly not a Bad Frog or Wolf!!!

Charlie
jamesconnors Offline
#15 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 7:56 AM EST
Joined: 11-02-2002
Posts: 378
i own a landscape construction company.....sometimes firing people is the nature of the beast.....believe me sometimes firing them is the best thing to do next to beating their heads in!! in my industry if i smoked a cigar everytime someone was hired and fired it would have to be garcia vegas i couldnt afford to do it anyonther way!!LOL
E-Chick Offline
#16 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 10:05 AM EST
Joined: 06-15-2002
Posts: 4,877
So, John...what was it? You've got to fill us in...

Although I've had similar experiences where I've fired numerous A$$HOLEs....I wasn't a cigar smoker at the time...it was usually my head that was smoking with the events leading up to the termination!

I thought the other John's advice was great and I'd have to concur...

Don't forget to fill us in on the festivities!
jgjam Offline
#17 Posted: Fri, Feb 14 2003, 4:17 PM EST
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
Excellent advice... I agree with one of the comments in that it is a good time to reflect on what I (management) could have done better but this unfortunate soul belonged in the "un-coachable" category and worked at being a disruptive force. While I have let employees go at times over many years (even fired one guy on Christmas Eve... probably will go to hell for that one) this was the first time I can ever remember of having absolutly no regret or concern for the individual because of his behavior. This was also the quickest and easiest termination I have ever performed as this individual knew from many prior conversations we have had over the last several weeks that his ass was not only on the line but hanging way over it.

Of course, once word spread throughout the company everyone (and I mean EVERYONE!) was overjoyed at his parting. And most didn't even work at the same location, they couldn't even deal with him over the phone.

Having said all that... this thread was simply meant to be lighthearted as most everyone took it for. I really loved the suggestions... excellent ideas from everyone!! What a creative bunch we have here on the board.

Of course I needed to eat lunch... of course a cigar at lunch is usual for me...

So... I took one of my favorites, an Oliva "O" Oasis, and had lunch with the poor b@st@rds replacement at my favorite restaurant.

Excellent lunch, cigar and conversation.

Of course the fact that all of the waitresses have verrry long legs, short skirts, lowww cut tops, dress entirely in black and wear heels had nothing to do food, cigar and conversation.

John
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