http://www.theonion.com/articles/remaking-the-republican-party,30551/
Mitt Romneyâs poor performance among minority voters, single women, and young people has led many top Republicans to call for an overhaul of the partyâs image. Here are some options the GOP is considering to extend its appeal:
Start nominating hipper, more relatable 65-year-old men
Begin rolling the Râs in âdeportationâ and âborder fenceâ
A bunch of abortions and stuffâwhatever the gals want
Change nothing and wait for rest of country to come to its senses
Project youthful vibe by requiring Republican congressmen to walk around Capitol doing yo-yo tricks
Change party mascot to a Hispanic elephant
Start one of those Twitter hashtags
Eh, **** itâjust disenfranchise as many people as possible
pdxstogieman wrote: