You should not have been in small claims court. You needed an action on your divorce decree to enforce the rights already bestowed upon you by the court. From you description, this was not a new cause of action. Actions between the same parties and in particular over the same subject matter are required by most courts under what is commonly called the "Doctrine of Merger." This is not the forum you need. You need to consult an attorney in your jurisdiction. Your divorce attorney will already be familiar with the subject matter of your complaint.

Just a note: Judgment is spelled with only one "e" although the spelling with two has gained acceptance in the past decade in American English.

WTG hog! I could've used you about 15 years ago! LOL

Sorry Hog, but the likelihood of your collecting what's owed isn't good. The judge essentially instructed your ex to make a voluntary payment arrangement, rather than an enforceable garnishment. Of course, she can be pulled back into court, but the court will only know about her lack of fulfilling the order by your refiling a motion. Yes, she could be held in contempt of court, depending on how the judge wrote his decision in the matter, but, again, it requires that you initiate a proceeding. I did read where your wife wrote, "She is to set these payments up by automatic withdrawal from her bank account. She cannot stop them or remove it off her bank account." Because it's not a garnishment, it becomes very difficult to enforce. Your ex, based on her past behavior, is unlikely to set up the payment vehicle.

Frankly, the issue becomes, is this really worth the $1K or $2k that this appears to be? It seems to me like you'd be much better off just putting closure on the relationship. That's certainly worth $2k.

31 years ago, I went through what I thought was an amicable divorce. There were no children; no hostilities. We both decided that the three years of marriage had been okay, but not destined to be long term. I was ready for roots and a family. My ex had other goals and, certainly, wanted no chldren. We went through a very gentle process of "mutual marriage dissolution." Because I'd been working out of our official state of residence during the proceedings, I did not see our joint bank statements. Only after I unsuccessfully tried to cash a check, did I discover that she'd cleaned out every account we had. Without getting into specific dollar amounts, she took enough to pay cash for a nice home in a good Minneapolis neighborhood. I immediately contacted an attorney/friend to inquire about what to do. He basically said, "Be thankful you're not paying alimony. If the bank accounts were joint and she withdrew the funds prior to the divorce filing, you have absolutely no recourse. Just be thankful the relationship is over."

It sounds to be like you have a great relationship with Mrs. Hog. It may be simply worth the $2k to never deal with your ex again.

"Your ex, based on her past behavior, is unlikely to set up the payment vehicle."

Steve*R

I agree with you.

This past marriage has cost him over $100,000 so far. She also took him for his retirement. He was ordered to give her the house and the car while he was to pay all the insurance on these after the divorce. His attorney bills were sky high. This judge he has faced even took his visitation rights away. Hog had set days with his ex and would go to pick the kids up and the ex would make sure they were no where around. She would refuse to speak to him. So, he would call the kids and ask them what days they would be available. They would set a day or days up and he would go to pick them up and she would refuse to allow them to go. The judge told him that since he did it this was he lost his visitation rights. He wouldn't even allow him to speak, just the ex and her side. Hog's attorney was a joke. Her attorney was suspended and was still allowed to proceed with all the hearings. Her attorney even went as far as calling his place of employment and impersonating Hog to get all his information. His ex wife in return, after directing her attorney to do this, sued him and won. She works for the Attorney General here in Illinois for the consumer fraud division and is one of the most devious human beings on the face of the earth. She has even went as far as directing Hog's son to drop out of high school to place him into continuing adult education classes so she could collect her $600.00 a month child support until he turned 19 years of age.

Now, it would be so much easier to just pay this debt and call it that. But the problem is she is like a cancer. She has drug Hog in and out of court over $$ to the point he was homeless. He was supporting her financially, even after the divorce, to the point he could not support himself. She almost totally distroyed him. She is now trying to distroy his children.

His oldest is in counseling to try to put the pieces of her life back together. His other two children were thrown out of the home after the child support stopped. They are now trying to grasp what life they have. We are now trying to get the other two children into couseling, but they refuse. We have told them our doors and hearts are open.

This is the first time Hog has ever been allowed to speak his side in court. He has proved numerous times in the past two hearings how she has lied and twisted the truth to get what she has wanted. The judge has listened and has sided with Hog. To me it is worth what ever it cost to get to see Hog finally get to tell his side. Just to watch her facial expressions when Hog produces the proof of her lies and the judge looks over his glasses in disgust and begins to question her is something I would never take away from Hog.

To clear something up... Hog did not take this to small claims court yet. This was just a motion filed under their divorce. We are holding off with small claims because we believe she will file bankruptcy. Once she has done this we will contest it in bankruptcy court and then on to small claims if the bankruptcy is allowed.

As for lawyers, we have done much better without one. With research and late night hours we have accomplished more then Hog did over the last 7 years with his poor excuse for a lawyer.

Hog nor I are vengeful people. I don't believe this is vengeance on Hog's part. She has to be stopped at some point and so far she has been peddling backwards.

As far as this being the wrong forum, No it is not. These people on this forum has been Hog's extended family through all this. They have kept him sane. I want to thank everyone for being here for Hog when he really needed to rant and rave about his life.

Mrs. Hog

Damn Hog

I thought I had a bad divorce...

Man I feel for you.

Mrs. Hog, you are a gracious and understanding woman. Hog is a very fortunate man to have you to share his life.

My point is that you can't change the past. Hog's ex is clearly a sociopath. She feels no remorse for what she has done to Hog and the children. Nothing...and you and I and Hog will agree, nothing will change the ex's behavior. It's the nature of being an amoral sociopath. Nothing she has done to impact others' bothers her. She will continue to behave as she has always behaved.

At some point, Hog has to say to himself, "I've had my day in court. I said what needed to be said. Now, the last thing I want to do is ever see or speak to her again."

Hog needs to sit down, pen in hand, and write a calm understanding letter to each of the children he had with his ex. He needs to tell them how much he loves them and how he tried to be a great father after the divorce, but "legal things" got in the way. There's no point in detailing his pain or telling the children that their mother is a sociopath.

Then, you both sincerely need to look to a wonderful future together and forget, entirely, about the ex. If it costs the unrecovered $2k, so be it. You'll have closure.

Best wishes,

Steve

Thanks for the great words of encouragement SteveR* and others...

I can say I had my day and court and we've (Mrs. Hog and I)been moving forward together..just getting the loose ends tied up from the past.. each of my 3 children are adults now, and have been dealing with their own issue's from the past as they grew up... I have always left them knowing my door and my heart is always open to them and since they are now out on their own. they also know we can have a relationship dealing directly between each other without their mothers intervention.. I do not degrade their mother in front of them, nor do I add my two cents worth in when they ask me what is wrong with their mother? I tell them this is something I cannot answer and will not answer for her?

Two of my oldest children have accepted Mrs. Hog as their mom, and to ask me who wouldn't? my oldest will call her on the phone and talk women issue's/boy issue's etc with her for hours and then tell her to tell her dad she loves me before she gets off the phone.. this bothers my wife.. I let her know it doesn't bother me one bit because I know my child needs that figure in her life more then myself at times... When my Son comes around to visit.. Mrs. Hog plays like she's invisible in the house and this bothers me.. she explains to me that the time he and I spend together is something he needs without a woman figure in between... (I guess she's right) because our relationship has expanded and we've become closer..

as far as the 100K figure the mrs. posted above.. I do not count the 40K that was child support and was to go to my children... I also think I got off fairly well with the 1/2 credit card debts subtracted from my total retirement she was awarded.. I paid and cleared my credit up... this bill is/was an ongoing Overdraft protection from a checking account she maintained and kept during and after the divorce which at the time of seperation it was only $468.00 of a total $1000.00 that could have been run up, and was.. when I seen this item was still being used and adding up. I called the company and had it closed by consumer.. that company sold it to another agency and a year or so later reopened the line of credit when it sold.. I again seen it was opened and again called and had it closed by consumer.. at that time it had already been maxed out and became an initial issue upon the final divorce hearings at which the Ex. was ordered to pay and indemnify me of anything... the company is the one's at fault because they do not honor divorce decree's nor Judgments... Now if this order holds water.. my credit will be back on a climb because at one time in 2002 my credit rating was in the 600's and climbing I was able to purchase my own home in 2001 and when Mrs. Hog and I got Married in 2002 and with a credit rating in the 600's I sold my Harley and told her to find us a Brand New Truck... (I wanted chevy Z-71 loaded to the gills) and I was deployed at the time... the local chevy dealer pissed her off with a smart azz comment (because the way she was dressed in her Bib overhauls shorts and t-shirt) he said she probably couldn't afford a new truck... she beat feet across the road to the Ford Dealership.. picked out the Truck she wanted and Got It! drove it back over to the chevy dealership and asked to see the Manager and explained to him about his salesman and what just transpired.. We Now own a 2002 Ford F-150 with towing package and all the bells and whistles...

the past is done and overwith.. but I will not allow anyone to continue to try and bring us down as we strive for our future goals together! this last episode I hope has sealed the last of my ex wifes interventions as I have already explained to my kids.. you deal directly with me and not through their mother.. my youngest is the only one who cannot understand this concept yet.. she will come around sooner then later and then that relationship can grow...

Hog

Good luck to the 5 of you.

I often have dreams of doing what Mrs.hog did at the dealership. Makes those salesmen just want to bite their tongues out.

Heeheehee!

hog, My situation is somewhat similar. My oldest is 17 and now gets upset if I call Heather(ruggysgirl) her stepmom. She says she earned being called mom. They do that female thing and I stay out of their hair! The important part is the people not the money as you know. Mrs Hog sounds like quite a woman! Lucky you. God bless, Bill