Im your average white, suburbanized slob

I like football and porno and books about war

I got an average house, with a nice hardwood floor

My wife and my job, my kids and my car

My feet on my table, and a Cuban cigar

But sometimes that just aint enough to keep a man like me interested

(oh no, no way, uh uh)

No I gotta go out and have fun at someone elses expense

(woah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah)

I drive really slow in the ultra fast lane

While people behind me are going insane

Im an a$$hole (hes an a$$hole,what an a$$hole)

Im an a$$hole (hes an a$$hole, such an a$$hole)