Ah, but I have two things to top that.
1. Crazybird. The world's craziest African Grey parrot. No kidding, just looking at her you know she's not wired up correctly. Loves being picked up by me, but I have to wear heavy gloves, because some times she just wants to tear part of my hand away. And now she says "bye!" and whistles about 1000 times each morning to me before I can get out the door. At least most of her feathers have grown back. She plucked out nearly all of them while with the previous owner.
2. An extensive history of reading client files and police reports to know that there are things in the typical American house that don't seem valuable, but which have some value to someone. It's all about who--and what--you know.