Burgess,
I don't know if just watching football makes you a hetrosexual.
I watch football by myself because sitting around with a bunch of dudes watching a bunch of dudes in tight pants slaping each other on the ass is really gay. Then you go home and watch the highlights on ESPN to relive the gay moments again. Double gay.
The choice was poon or football. If I was guaranteed the poontang anytime I wanted I would give up damn near anything. Cigars, booze, football. The woman cant take the pounding, and wont make the bet.