Ram told me it was ok to not ignore him as long as I was supportive of him.
its trench war mentality. pick your trench and who ever in it can do what they want and you support them.
the other trench is wrong and must be handled agreesively. not choosing one trench is wishy washy.
I for one feel for smashed and his grandpa and hope they both get help if not too late. Ram says that puts me in their trench this time so its all good.
Also he gave me some great advice on buying a shaved ice machine thus making it not necessary for me to post an advice request in here.