This is from monday night's Daily Show with Jon Stewart. This is the funniest little piece of comedy that I have heard in a long time. I just about fell out of my chair laughing.
Jon Stewart -I'm joined now by our own Vice-president fire-arms mishap analyst Rob Cordry. Just a very unfortunate situation. How is the Vice-president handling it?
Rob Cordry - Jon, tonight the Vice-president is standing by his decision to shoot Harry Wittington. Now, according to the best intelligence available, there were quail hidden in the brush. Everyone believed at the time there were quail in the brush. And while the quail turned out to be a 78 year old man, even knowing that today, Mr Cheney insists he still would've shot Mr wittington in the face. Jon, he believes the world is a better place for his spreading buckshot thoughout the entire region of Mr Wittington's face.
JS - Rob, why if he had known that Mr Wittington was not a bird... if he'd had that information Rob, why would the Vice-president still have shot him in the face?
RC - Jon, good question. In a post 9/11 world, the American people expect their leaders to be decisive. To not have shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.
JS - Rob, that is ... I have to say, to my ears that is horrible that he would still do that.
RC - Look jon, the mear fact that we're even talking about how the Vice-president drives up with his rich friends in cars to shoot farm-raised wingless quail-tards is letting the quail know how we're hunting them. I'm sure right now those birds are laughing at us in their little covey of theirs.
JS - well rob I'm not sure birds can laugh...
RC - Well whatever they do Jon.... cooo...they're coo-ing at us right now. because here we are talking openly about our plans to hunt them. Jig's up Jon. Quails one, America zero. Happy?
JS - On a purely human level, on a human level, is the Vice-president at least sorry?
RC - Jon, what difference does it make? The bullets are already in the man's face. Let's move forward accross party lines, as a people, to get him some sort of mask. Hindsight is 20-20 Jon, as was ironically the shotgun the Vice-president used to shoot his friend, a 78 year old man, in what can only be described as, his face.
JS - Thank you. Rob Cordry everybody. We'll be right back.
