HORMONE HOSTAGE

Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands.

This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or male child.

Copy, print, and save the following!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

DANGEROUS: Why are you so worked up?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: Wow! Look at you!

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe.


Top 10 Things PMS Stands For:
1 Pass My Shotgun
2 Pack My Stuff
3 Perpetual Munching Spree
4 Puffy Mid Section
5 People Make Me Sick
6 Provide Me with Sweets
7 Pardon My Sobbing
8 Pimples May Surface
9 Plainly; Men Suck
10 Please; More Salt

Hope that helps!

Funny stuff E!

Oh, I forgot one...

11. Pu$$y momentarily shutdown!

That's a common one...

E-Chick

" Pu$$y "

is that the same as package?

E-Chick,
You hit that one right on the nose, and I`m sure I`m not the only Hormone hostage here!!!!

Thanks fer the tips.

P.S. did I hear your sneakers leaking in another thread? LOL :o)

Im a fan of the "Puffy Mid Section" one.

daveyg2

"E-Chick

" Pu$$y "

is that the same as package?"

Only in your of the liberal persuation Rick.Otherwise a Pu$$y is a Pu$$y and a pkg is a pkg...

"Only if"....Doh! :0)

Honey,I lost 5 lbs.

Dangerous: That's like Mt.Everest losing a shovel full of dirt.
Safer: Looks like you lost 10 lbs.
Safest: But Honey,you didn't need to lose any weight.
X

Honey, do you think my ass is too big?
Dangerous: Not for a hippopotamus.
Better: I like a big giant ass.
Safest: Don't be silly. It's perfect, just like the rest of you, snookiewookums.

Dont we all?