....my birthday is next week and my wife won't let me have cigars for my b-day gift....(true)
....spent all my cigar money on vet bills paying for a stray I rescued.....(false)
....my dog ate all my cigars....(false)
....my wife abuses me....(damn true!)
....I'm sad....(false)
....I'm poor....(1/2 true)
....I'm in college.....(false)
Come to think of it, I may need booze donations instead!LOL!