A doctor walks in an exam room to find a woman crying. She has two black eyes, her make up is running, and generally looks like ****. This is not going to be a standard check-up, he thinks to himself. "What happened to you?" asked the Doc.
The woman breaks down even further and can barely speak between sobbing. "It's my husband. I just can't take it anymore. I love him, but I can't put up with this much longer," she says. "I'd do anything to make it stop."
The Doc closes his eyes and asks, "What happens exactly?"
"Everything is fine until the weekend. That's when the problems start. He goes out drinking with his buddies and plays cards, which he's horrible at." The Doc nods his head for her to continue. "He always comes home drunk and pissed off. Without fail, I end up getting beat."
He thinks for a moment and asks, "You'd do anything to make it better?"
"Yes, anything!"
"I want you to go home and make a pitcher of sweet tea." The Doc holds up his hand to stop the inevitable questions and continues. "When your husband comes home from his night of drinking, I want you to pour yourself a glass of tea. Take the biggest mouthful you can and hold it there until your husband goes to sleep. Do this and I promise you the beatings will stop."
The woman has doubt in her eyes, but is at the end of her rope. She'll try anything once at this point.
Several weeks go by and the Doc walks into an exam room to see the same woman. She looks a thousand times better, has a smile on her face, and best of all no signs of recent abuse.
"Doc, it worked! I did everything you asked." She's obviously excited. "I made that sweet tea and poured myself a glass. When my husband came home drunk after a bad night of cards, I took the biggest mouthful of tea I could. I held it there until he went to sleep." The Doc can see tears of happiness forming in the woman's eyes. "I think you've save my sanity and my marriage, thank you."
The Doc looks the woman in the eyes, "See what happens when you keep your @%#*! mouth shut?"
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