Please tell me that you did't use three shells to wipe your backside, too.

Heather... no seashells here. Baby wipes work great though. Much better than the standard 50 grit toilet paper the military buys.

Heather, could you please explain how those shells work?

I think one covers each boob and then the other covers the coochie.

Mmmmmmmm... Heather wearing seashells...

D'OH!!

billyjackson, Tuck can't help it if Leviticus says that those who say "****" are an abomination. It's not his fault that the FCC merely adopted the scriptural prohibited words list. It's only antinomian fools like us who would seek to dissent from his reading of those rules.

Did you ever see Demolition Man? Their whole society was based on political correctness and the public good. The replaced toilet tissue with 3 shells, I would imagine to save the trees.

Of course. Stallone asked at the end how to use the shells and received no response. I just thought you might have some inside info.

Well, according to Shawn, they are to be used as a bikini of sorts. I don't think giant clam shells can be held up by bikini strings. I suppose I could just crouch behind one.

I don't see how a shell bikini could be used to replace toilet paper.

Me neither! 😛