usahog
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Saturday, January 24, 2004 5:22:00 AM
WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN

To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own,

grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something to make

you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the

thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first

thing he said was "DON'T!"

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.

"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have Forbidden

fruit!!!!!"

"No Way!"

"Yes way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.

"Why"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why He

hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later,

God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you?" said the Father.

"I don't know," said Eve.

"She started it!" Adam said

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve

should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has

never changed.

BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and

they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble

raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for

you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and

talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut

up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for

word what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself

that there are children more awful than your own.

6. We child proofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing

home.

AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT

IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM

CHILDREN"

Pass this onto a parent, grandparent, anyone that might be in contact with

a child.

Enjoy!!!

Hog

CWFoster
Saturday, January 24, 2004 9:41:00 AM
I can relate!
gorob23
Saturday, January 24, 2004 10:00:00 AM
FOTFLMAO

Me have kids !!! LOL OO this one goes to my dad. And my poor mom, RIP, After #2 I told her " Mom if I had known I would have been a much better little boy 🙂

This is just what I needed after this AM. Thanks Rob