Jesus loves you... but everyone else thinks you are an ass.

Impotence...Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings,"

The proctologist called ...they found your head.

Everyone has a photographic memory ....some just don't have any film.

Save your breath...You'll need it to blow up your date.

Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted.

I used to have a handle on life...but it broke off.

WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.

Guys...just because you have one, doesn't mean you have to be one.

Some people just don't know how to drive...
I call these people "Everybody But Me,"

Heart Attacks...God's revenge for eating His animal friends.

Don't like my driving?
Then quit watching me.

If you can read this...I can slam on my brakes and sue you.

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

Try not to let your mind wander...It is too small and fragile to be out by itself.

Hang up and drive!!

Welcome to America....now speak English

I like the Heart-Attack sticker...now thats funny...

RasDas

Joe

Yet a couple more;

My other ride is your mother

Nuke a gay whale for Jesus

I just left your house, your wife says "hi"
(Saw this on a milk truck)

JESUS IS COMING.....
and boy is he pissed!

Kerry 4 President

Edwards 4 President

Sharpton 4 President

Kucinich 4 President

Nader 4 President

Rickamaven 4 Bush

Normal people make me nervous

D.A.M.M.
(Drunks Against Madd Mothers)

"BUSH AND ****** IN 2004: we can all get screwed for 4 more years!"

one that my then-gf gave me (and i'm not gutsy enough to put it on my vehicle: "my other toy has t*ts"

if it has T*Ts or Tires it's going to be Trouble...

if it flys floats or F*&ks its cheaper to rent it...

Hog

Grow your own dope.....
Plant a Man


P.E.T.A.

People Eat Tasty Animals
This one I have on my truck........

So many cats...so few recipies

Drive like you stole it!

Keep honking...I'm reloading.

I love my country. I fear my government.

I owe, I owe It's off to work I go.

Nice people swallow

When I retire, I'm moving NORTH and drive real slow in the fast lane!

Welcome to Florida. Disney World is in Orlando

Eat the Manatees

Piping Plover taste like chicken.

The genepool, needs a lifeguard.
UFO's are real, The AirForce doesn't exist.
My kid, can beat up your honor student
I brake for hallucinations
My other car doesn't exist

The genepool, needs a lifeguard.
UFO's are real, The AirForce doesn't exist.
My kid, can beat up your honor student
I brake for hallucinations
My other car doesn't exist

Oooops

I saw one of my favorite political bumper stickers many years ago when Jerry Brown was running for governor of California. It simply read: "If it's Brown, flush it!"