USNGunner
6 years ago
1. Basically, you can't leave the house for any reason, but if you have to, then you can.

2. Masks are useless, but maybe you have to wear one, it can save you, it is useless, but maybe it is mandatory as well.

3. Stores are closed, except those that are open.

4. You should not go to hospitals unless you have to go there. Same applies to doctors, you should only go there in case of emergency, provided you are not too sick.

5. This virus is deadly but still not too scary, except that sometimes it actually leads to a global disaster.

6. Gloves won't help, but they can still help.

7. Everyone needs to stay HOME, but it's important to GO OUT.

8. There is no shortage of groceries in the supermarket, but there are many things missing when you go there in the evening, but not in the morning. Sometimes.

9. The virus has no effect on children except those it affects.

10. Animals are not affected, but there is still a cat that tested positive in Belgium in February when no one had been tested, plus a few tigers here and there…

11. You will have many symptoms when you are sick, but you can also get sick without symptoms, have symptoms without being sick, or be contagious without having symptoms. Oh, my God.

12. In order not to get sick, you have to eat well and exercise, but eat whatever you have on hand and it's better not to go out, well, but no…

13. It's better to get some fresh air, but you get looked at very wrong when you get some fresh air, and most importantly, you don't go to parks or walk. But don’t sit down, except that you can do that now if you are old, but not for too long or if you are pregnant (but not too old).

14. You can't go to retirement homes, but you have to take care of the elderly and bring food and medication.

15. If you are sick, you can't go out, but you can go to the pharmacy.

16. You can get restaurant food delivered to the house, which may have been prepared by people who didn't wear masks or gloves. But you have to have your groceries decontaminated outside for 3 hours. Pizza too?

17. Every disturbing article or disturbing interview starts with " I don't want to trigger panic, but…"

18. You can't see your older mother or grandmother, but you can take a taxi and meet an older taxi driver.

19. You can walk around with a friend but not with your family if they don't live under the same roof.

20. You are safe if you maintain the appropriate social distance, but you can’t go out with friends or strangers at the safe social distance.

21. The virus remains active on different surfaces for two hours, no, four, no, six, no, we didn't say hours, maybe days? But it takes a damp environment. Oh no, not necessarily.

22. The virus stays in the air - well no, or yes, maybe, especially in a closed room, in one hour a sick person can infect ten, so if it falls, all our children were already infected at school before it was closed. But remember, if you stay at the recommended social distance, however in certain circumstances you should maintain a greater distance, which, studies show, the virus can travel further, maybe.

23. We count the number of deaths but we don't know how many people are infected as we have only tested so far those who were "almost dead" to find out if that's what they will die of…

24. We have no treatment, except that there may be one that apparently is not dangerous unless you take too much (which is the case with all medications). Orange man bad.

25. We should stay locked up until the virus disappears, but it will only disappear if we achieve collective immunity, so when it circulates… but we must no longer be locked up for that?
Gene363
6 years ago
That pretty much sums it all up.

delta1
6 years ago
it's a cluster fu#k, and stuff changes daily...gotta be flexible and adjust...

new normal is abnormal...

old normal could kill you and your loved ones
Buckwheat
6 years ago

it's a cluster fu#k, and stuff changes daily...gotta be flexible and adjust...

new normal is abnormal...

old normal could kill you and your loved ones

delta1 wrote:



Abby someone. Abby Normal? 🍺
USNGunner
6 years ago

Abby someone. Abby Normal? 🍺

Buckwheat wrote:



"Are you saying that I put an abnormal brain into an seven and a half foot long, 54 inch wide... [short pause as he begins to choke Igor], GORILLA!? [picks up Igor by the neck and chokes him] IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME!?"
MACS
6 years ago
Oh, and now it can travel 13 feet, not 6 feet... and it sticks to your shoes.

https://nypost.com/2020/04/12/the-coronavirus-can-travel-at-least-13-feet-new-study-shows/ 
HockeyDad
6 years ago
The new guidelines are when shopping for essential items, you must do so while hopping on one foot.
Cheno
6 years ago
I just posted this yesterday in a new thread haha. Thief.
RobertHively
6 years ago

Post of the week, Cheno & Gunny, for sure.

I sent this to several of my friends and they all got a laugh out of it. Thanks.
USNGunner
6 years ago

I just posted this yesterday in a new thread haha. Thief.

Cheno wrote:



Crap. LOL. Sorry, missed it. Mea Culpa. 😣

Better double coverage than not enough. 👍
Sunoverbeach
6 years ago
Great, now I'm twice as confused on protocol 🤦
Cheno
6 years ago

Crap. LOL. Sorry, missed it. Mea Culpa. 😣

Better double coverage than not enough. 👍

USNGunner wrote:



All good sir. As long as people understand the facts, if they don't they should find someone who does, and have them explain it to them, as long as they stay socially distant from each other, or don't.
USNGunner
6 years ago

All good sir. As long as people understand the facts, if they don't they should find someone who does, and have them explain it to them, as long as they stay socially distant from each other, or don't.

Cheno wrote:



"Facts?" ROTFLMAO.

You can make data say what ever you want it to. "And that's all I got to say about that." 😂
Cheno
6 years ago

"Facts?" ROTFLMAO.

You can make data say what ever you want it to. "And that's all I got to say about that." 😂

USNGunner wrote:




Well we do know that 68% of statistics are made up on the spot.
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