The world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make is taking a stroll down his local high street.

As he passes by the record shop, a sign catches his eye. Just Released — New LP -Wasps of Europe & the sounds that they make — available now!

Unable to resist the temptation, the man goes into the shop.

I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make. I’d very much like to listen to the new LP you have advertised in the window.

Certainly, Sir says the young man behind the counter.

If you’d like to step into the booth and put on the headphones, I’ll put the LP on for you.

The world expert on European wasps goes into the booth and puts on the earphones. Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth and announces, I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I recognized none of those.

I’m sorry Sir, says the young assistant, if you’d care to step into the booth, I can let you have another 10 minutes.

The world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make steps back into the booth and replaces the headphones.

Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth shaking his head. I don’t understand it, he says, I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make, and yet I still can’t recognize any of those!

I’m terribly sorry, sir says the young man, perhaps if you’d like to step into the booth again, you could have 5 more minutes.

Sighing, the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make steps back into the booth. Five minutes later, he comes out again, clearly agitated.

I am the world expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I have recognized none of the wasps on this LP.

I really am terribly sorry, says the young assistant, I’ve just realized I was playing you the bee side.

🤦

😂

[ram27bat]

half the audience never heard of the b side.

HA!

Amazingly I did not see that one coming.

It's a goody!!

But you'll see the kids with their phones and hear them say "I got that on video tape". WTF?

I'd like to use it not really up to trying to explain to folks what the B side is much less an LP.

Love it!
Only us FOG’s get it

What about the African wasps?

Good one!

---

One day, a man from the Czech Republic came to visit his friend in New York.

When asked what he wanted to see, the visitor replied, “I would like to see one of the zoos in America.”

To his delight, the New Yorker took him to the Bronx Zoo.

They were touring the zoo, and standing in front of the gorilla cage, when one of the gorillas busted out of the cage and swallowed the Czech whole.

Shocked, his friend from New York quickly called over the zoo keeper. He quickly explained the situation and the zoo keeper immediately took steps to save the man’s friend.

The zoo keeper got an axe and asked the man, which gorilla did it, was it the male or the female?

The New Yorker pointed out the female as the culprit.

Quickly, the zoo keeper split the female gorilla open and found nothing of the Czech.

He looked at the man from New York, who shrugged and said, Guess the Czech is in the male.

Of course it is. 🍺

---

but the male is running late

Czech, please

A long time ago, there was a beehive in the middle of a forest.

Every day, as worker bees do, they would go out into their fields, gather pollen from the flowers, and bring it back to make honey.

The bees had a problem, though, because every so often an intruder would come around, such as a bear who wanted the honey, or kids who thought it’d be fun to throw rocks at the hive. Finally, the bees got tired of it.

Being the intelligent bees that they are, they built an alarm system for the hive. They built it such that one bee pulls a lever, which triggers the alarm that the bees will hear from the fields, and then the bees can come back to protect their home.

There was one bee who was exclusively assigned that job, and he was aptly named the “Lever Bee.” His job was to watch for potential adversaries, and pull the lever to raise the alarm.

Now clearly, the safety of the hive depends on this one Lever Bee. So it stands to reason that he has to be constantly ready and on the alert so that he can do his job.

And that, friends, is why people say, “I’m as ready as a Lever Bee.”

=d>

The Final

There were four sophomores taking chemistry and all of them had an 'A' so far. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time but, after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to the university until early Monday morning.

Rather than taking the final then, they decided that after the final they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said they visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final. The professor agreed they could makeup the final the next day.

The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night for the exam. The next day the professor placed them in separate rooms and gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points. Cool, they thought! Each one, in a separate room, thought this was going to be easy ... then they turned the page . . .

On the second page was written... For 95 points: Which tire?

Gotta love this teacher!

---

Ten thousand years ago the first humans came to North America by crossing over from Russia to Alaska.

They hadn’t actually intended to do this.

They got lost and couldn’t get their Berings Strait.

=d>

---

So they were just rolling around.

---

😁