E-Chick
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Friday, March 7, 2003 2:00:00 PM
There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:

1. He called everyone "brother"

2. He liked Gospel

3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:

1. He went into His Fathers business.

2. He lived at home until he was 33.

3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his mother was sure he was God.

.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:

1. He talked with his hands.

2. He had wine with every meal.

3. He used olive oil.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:

1. He never cut his hair.

2. He walked around barefoot all the time.

3. He started a new religion.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:

1. He never got married.

2. He was always telling stories.

3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all---

3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:

1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food.

2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it

3. And even when he was dead, He had to get up because there was more work to do.

Can I hear an Amen from the ladies!?

daveyg2
Friday, March 7, 2003 9:27:00 PM
Amen.

daveyg2

JonR
Saturday, March 8, 2003 5:04:00 AM
I don't get it... hehe, BTW Jesus was Polish when he was a carpenter he shortened his name from Christinski to Christ for business reasons. JonR
RICKAMAVEN
Saturday, March 8, 2003 6:28:00 AM
e chick

excellent post. i'll give you an amen.

Slimboli
Saturday, March 8, 2003 7:07:00 AM
... hummmmmm ... so far only two 'ladies'???

;^)

Charlie
Saturday, March 8, 2003 7:14:00 AM
Great Post!

Charlie

jdrabinski
Saturday, March 8, 2003 7:19:00 AM
Jesus was also a guy who'd be horrified by what american christians do in his name. I'll say that much.

Support the death penalty? The guy was a VICTIM of the death penalty, for God's sake (no pun intended).

donutboy2000
Saturday, March 8, 2003 8:38:00 AM
He came to earth to be a victim of the death penalty. Somewhat pretentious to think that you could speak for Christ and what would horrify Him today.
usahog
Saturday, March 8, 2003 8:45:00 AM
he's trying to toss at me Donut... Notice he say's American Christians... when if he knew **** about the bible or History... America wasn't even apart of his (Jesus's) Crusifix

John needs to stick to blowing smoke up college students A$$'s... LMAO!!!!!

Hog

RICKAMAVEN
Saturday, March 8, 2003 9:54:00 AM
someone help me please. i remember reading the actual number of words spoken by christ according to the bible, but i can't find the reference to it.

donutboy2000

without my exact number, i can only point out to you that every evangelist, priest, minister, preacher, and all the other's who prostelytize, tell anyone who will listen what jesus said or what he meant by what he said. that would make them all

"Somewhat pretentious"

Todog
Saturday, March 8, 2003 1:41:00 PM
Wasn't he a hispanic or latino character on Hill Street Blues?
xibbumbero
Saturday, March 8, 2003 1:55:00 PM
Jesus is my next door neighbor. X
emgjet
Saturday, March 8, 2003 2:19:00 PM
Nice post E-Chick.

LOL at Todog and X above!

jdrabinski
Saturday, March 8, 2003 2:22:00 PM
usahog, I said 'American christians' because they are the only christians I know much about, other than the Vatican. Nothing personal, actually.

Donutboy, Jesus came with a message, it was recorded, I've read it and thought about it a lot, so I don't feel at all inhibited about interpreting it. Pretty hard to interpret wrongly the message of mercy over retribution. In fact, that is pretty much the central motif of the four gospels.

Yes, I know he had to die to save humanity. So, I reform my statement: Jesus is hardly a death penalty supporter, except for those cases of a messianic character whose death will save the human race.

That pretty much doesn't cover anyone on death row here or elsewhere.

John

E-Chick
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Saturday, March 8, 2003 2:31:00 PM
John,

Them is big words...dunno if'n w'all get it!

LOL!

I'm glad everyone has enjoyed my post and fed their thoughts with it...

xibbumbero
Saturday, March 8, 2003 3:33:00 PM
What the hell did he say? X
usahog
Saturday, March 8, 2003 3:40:00 PM
Taken From Ricks Post:(every evangelist, priest, minister, preacher, and all the other's who prostelytize,tell anyone who will listen what jesus said or what he meant by what he said. that would make them all) and Now we have John,JDR,Ski are you trying to be a self Proclaimed Profit?? there was already a John in the Bible..."Jesus is hardly a death penalty supporter, except for those cases of a messianic character whose death will save the human race." Looks like Prophising (sp) to me...

Hog

jdrabinski
Saturday, March 8, 2003 4:09:00 PM
I am the way, I am the Truth. Follow me, usahog, to La Casa del Habano, and therein we shalt partake of the Lord's leafed blessings.

Amen.

Johnny Prophet

tarheel4lyf
Sunday, March 9, 2003 8:47:00 AM
Why did this go from being a nice friendly joke, to being a big philosophical debate over religion and capital punishment? Jesus, John........just read the nice post and move on.....
jamesconnors
Sunday, March 9, 2003 9:06:00 AM
religon is for the weak!