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Greatest movie lines, scenes
Robby Offline
#1 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
Clint Eastwood, The Outlaw Jose Wales,
"You a bounty hunter?"
(Bounty hunter) "A man's gotta make a livin"
"Clint, dyin aint much of a livin boy"
The bounty hunter turns and leaves the bar, Clint goes back to his whiskey. The doors swing back open and the bounty hunter comes back in. He looks at Clint and says, "I had to come back..." Clint says, "I know", they draw, and Clint kills him (flying backwards in a hail of gun fire through the swinging saloon doors.)
DrMaddVibe Offline
#2 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Jack Nicholson in The Shining when he's talking to the bartender, Lloyd. Brilliant stuff.

I saw The Hulk yesterday, and was taken by Nolte's performance, he should be nominated for it! It's really good at the end when he's trying to get Bruce to "transform"...that's the stuff Hollywood is supposed to give us!
Lowman Offline
#3 Posted:
Joined: 12-03-2002
Posts: 6,982
Rodney Dangerfield in "Back to School"

"Bring a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until someone passes out... then bring one every ten."
RDC Offline
#4 Posted:
Joined: 01-21-2000
Posts: 5,874
Stellaaaaaaa!!!!!!
RDC Offline
#5 Posted:
Joined: 01-21-2000
Posts: 5,874
What are you laughing at?
Are you laughing at me?
Do I make you laugh?
Do I look funny or something?
RDC Offline
#6 Posted:
Joined: 01-21-2000
Posts: 5,874
Welcome to The Rock!
RDC Offline
#7 Posted:
Joined: 01-21-2000
Posts: 5,874
I give you these 15
(crash)
Ten... Ten Commandments
DrMaddVibe Offline
#8 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Ferris Bueller - Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
DrMaddVibe Offline
#9 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Sarah Connor: You're terminated, ****.
DrMaddVibe Offline
#10 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Morpheus: You take the blue pill, the story ends...you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in wonderland and I'll show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.
Danny Offline
#11 Posted:
Joined: 06-21-2002
Posts: 613
Liza Minnelli to Dudley Moore in Arthur:

"what's it like to be rich"

"it doesn't suck"
Danny Offline
#12 Posted:
Joined: 06-21-2002
Posts: 613
"pay no attention to that man behind the curtain"
Danny Offline
#13 Posted:
Joined: 06-21-2002
Posts: 613
Groucho Marx - "hello I must be going"
sketcha Offline
#14 Posted:
Joined: 03-26-2003
Posts: 3,238
Anything from Caddyshack of course. Probably the most over-quoted movie of all time. I still do it all the time though.


"Do you own rubber gloves Mr. Nugent?"
"I rent 'em. I have a lease with an option to buy."

"I saw my pimp today."

"What kind of name is Poon anyway?"
"Comanche Indian."
Fletch


"Watch your mouth kid or you'll find yourself floating home"
Han Solo-Star Wars IV


"Take it easy honey, I didn't see a thing..... You're perfect."

"Now that's what I call marine biology.....Diane!!!!! Say "Hello" to my nieces.!"

"Lay off Vanessa, she gives great headache."

"Mr. Melon. Your wife was just showing us her Climpt."
"You too uh? She's been showin' it to everybody."
"She's very proud of it."
"Yeah, I'm proud a' mine too, but I don't go wavin' it around at parties."
"Exceptional painting!"
"Oh, the painting, yeah."

"I have absolutely nothing to wear."
"You have six closets full of nothing to wear!"

"You have no class Thornton and I'm tired of it! I want a divorce!"
"At least we have something in common, here, sign these!"
Back to School


"Do you know what it's like to get shoved down... in the mud... and get kicked... in the head... with an iron boot?....Of course you don't, nobody does, that never happens. That's a dumb question, skip that."
Robert Stack-Airplane RIP


"Great ass!"
Leaving Las Vegas


More later
DrMaddVibe Offline
#15 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
From "Scarface"

"You think I got this scar eatin p**sy?"

"Say hello to my little friend..."
DrMaddVibe Offline
#16 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Spicolli: I'm so wasted.
DrMaddVibe Offline
#17 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Drill Instructor: How tall are you private?

Cowboy: Sir! Five foot nine, sir!

Drill Instructor: Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked **** that high! You tryin' to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh?

Cowboy: Sir! No Sir!

Drill Instructor: Bull****. It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you been cheated! Where in the hell are you from anyway, private?

Cowboy: Sir! Texas, Sir!

Drill Instructor: Holy dog ****! Texas? Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy. And you don't look much like a steer to me so that kinda narrows it down. Do you suck dicks?

Cowboy: Sir! No Sir!

Drill Instructor: Are you a peter puffer?

Cowboy: Sir! No Sir!

Drill Instructor: I'll bet you're the kinda guy that would **** a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you.
DrMaddVibe Offline
#18 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Vinny: What's the matter with you?

Mona Lisa: I don't know...

Vinny: You're actin' like you're nervous or something.

Mona Lisa: Well, yeah, I am.

Vinny: What are you nervous about? I'm the one under the gun here. Trial starts tomorrow.

Mona Lisa: You wanna know what I'm nervous about? I'll tell you what I'm nervous about! I am in the dark here with all this legal crap. I have no idea what's going on! All I know is that you're screwing up and I can't help!

Vinny: You left me that little camera, didn't you?

Mona Lisa: Oh, Vinny! I'm watching you go down in flames, and you're bringing me with you and I can't do anything about it.

Vinny: And?

Mona Lisa: Well, I hate to bring it up, because I know you have enough pressure on you already. BUT, we agreed to get married as soon as you won your first case. Meanwhile, ten years later, my niece! The daughter of my sister is getting married! My biological
clock is tickin' like this, and with the way this case is goin', I ain't never gettin' married!

Vinny: Lisa, I don't need this. I swear to God I don't need this right now. Okay? I've got a judge that's just achin' to throw me in jail! An idiot who wants to fight me for $200! Slaughtered pigs! Giant loud whistles! I ain't slept in five days! I've got no money! A dress code problem! And a little murder case, which in the balance holds the lives of two innocent kids. Not to mention....YOUR biological clock! My career! Your life! Our marriage! And let's see...what else can we pile on? Is there any more **** we can pile on to the top of the outcome of this case?!
IS IT POSSIBLE?

Mona Lisa: Maybe it was a bad time to bring it up.
HarleyDave Offline
#19 Posted:
Joined: 03-10-2003
Posts: 1,550
Two other great lines from Josie Wales. One right after he and his partner kill two bounty hunters.

Partner: "It's a shame we don't have time to bury them proper"

Josie Wales: "Vultures got to eat too"

And the best line from that movie;

"Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining"
mkraus47 Offline
#20 Posted:
Joined: 02-04-2003
Posts: 196
Movie: Tombstone
Scene: Doc Holliday and random member of Wyatt’s posse.

Posse: “Why you doing this man?”
(in reference to the rounding up and killing of the bad guys, a very dangerous job considering Wyatt and crew are out numbered 4 to 1.)

Doc: “Cuz Wyatt’s my friend”

Posse: “Shoot!! I got lots a friends”

Doc: “I don’t”





Second on my list is in Gladiator when Crow is standing there in the middle of the Roman Collosium, dieing from a stab wound infliced by a cheating wuss(whom Crow still manages to kill)

He looks out to the thousands of people and just before he falls to the ground he says so all can hear

”There once was a dream that was Rome”


Third Braveheart. Right before Wallace (Gibson) goes off to meet the Bruce for the last time

Hamish: “You know it’s a trap don’t ya.”

Wallace: “Ya but we got to try”

Hamish: “Why?”

Wallace: “You know what will happen if we don’t?”

Hamish: “What?”

Wallace: “Nothing.”



Maybe not in this order but those are my favorites!!
BeatDragon Offline
#21 Posted:
Joined: 02-28-2003
Posts: 4,754
Igor "Two nasty looking switches over here"

(throws switches, short out and catch fire)

Dr. "DAMN YOUR EYES!

I "Too late!"

BeatDragon Offline
#22 Posted:
Joined: 02-28-2003
Posts: 4,754
Inga "He would have an enormus schwanschtucker"

Dr. "That goes without saying"
BeatDragon Offline
#23 Posted:
Joined: 02-28-2003
Posts: 4,754
Greatest opening monolougue ever...

Now I want you to remember that no **** ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb **** die for his country. Men, all this stuff you've heard about America not wanting to fight - wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dung. Americans traditionally love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle. When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, big league ball players, the toughest boxers. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never lost and never will lose a war, because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans. Now, an army is a team - it lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap... Now, we have the finest food and equipment, the best spirit, and the best men in the world. You know, by god, I actually pity those poor bastards we're goin' up against. By god, I do. We're not just gonna shoot the ****, we're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks. We're going to murder those lousy Hun bastards by the bushel. Now, some of you boys, I know, are wondering whether or not you'll chicken out under fire. Don't worry about it. I can assure you that you will all do your duty. The Nazis are the enemy. Wade into them, spill their blood, shoot them in the belly. When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do. Now there's another thing I want you to remember. I don't want to get any messages saying that we are holding our position. We're not holding anything. Let the Hun do that. We are advancing constantly and we're not interested in holding onto anything except the enemy. We're going to hold onto him by the nose and we're gonna kick him in the ass. We're going to kick the hell out of him all the time and we're gonna go through him like crap through a goose. Now, there's one thing that you men will be able to say when you get back home, and you may thank god for it. Thirty years from now when you're sitting around your fireside with your grandson on your knee, and he asks you: 'What did you do in the Great World War II?', you won't have to say: 'Well, I shoveled **** in Louisiana.' All right, now you sons-of-bitches, you know how I feel and I will be proud to lead you wonderful guys into battle anytime, anywhere. That's all.
G.S. Patton
SteveR@CigarBid Offline
#24 Posted:
Joined: 11-19-2002
Posts: 12,746
"It's just a game, Focker!" ~Meet the Parents

"I had an AWESOME time last night" ~Oldschool

"I'm your Huckleberry" ~Tombstone

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist" ~The Usual Suspects
eleltea Offline
#25 Posted:
Joined: 03-03-2002
Posts: 4,562
Don Corleone: I'll make him an offer he can't refuse.



Robby Offline
#26 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
I know what you're thinking, did he fire 6 shots? Or only 5, you know, in all the excitement, I forgot myself. Now this here is a .44 magnum, the world's most powerful handgun, and it could blow your head clean off, now you gotta ask yourself, do you feel lucky? Well do ya? Punk?
Robby Offline
#27 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
Just when I thought, you couldn't POSSIBLY do anything dumber, you turn around AND COMPLETELY REDEEM YOURSELF!
Robby Offline
#28 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
Why did you just kiss my ear?
Why are YOU holding my hand?
Where's your other hand?
Between two pillows.
THOSE AREN'T PILLOWS!!!
merlin9052 Offline
#29 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
"It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas and a half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses.
THL Offline
#30 Posted:
Joined: 10-22-2002
Posts: 3,044
Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
merlin9052 Offline
#31 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
"Fill your hand,you son of a bitch!"
DrMaddVibe Offline
#32 Posted:
Joined: 10-21-2000
Posts: 55,507
Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?

Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man.

Peter Gibbons: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?

Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money.

Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.

Lawrence: Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on me do.

Peter Gibbons: Good point.

Lawrence: What about you, what would you do?

Peter Gibbons: Besides two chicks at the same time?

Lawrence: Well yeah.

Peter Gibbons: Nothing.

Lawrence: Nothing, huh?

Peter Gibbons: I'd relax, sit on my ass all day, I would do nothing.

Lawrence: Well you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Just take a look at my cousin, he's broke, he don't do ****.
SteveR@CigarBid Offline
#33 Posted:
Joined: 11-19-2002
Posts: 12,746
And of course...Happy Gilmore

Happy's Grandmom: Sir, can I trouble you for a warm glass of milk? It helps me go to sleep.

Nursing Home Worker: You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up! Now, you will go to sleep or I will put you to sleep. You're in my world now, grandma.

------

Shooter: You're in big trouble though pal. I eat pieces of **** like you for breakfast!

Happy: You eat pieces of **** for breakfast?

Shooter: ........ NO!

http://funwavs.com/wavfile.php?quote=840&sound=182
jgjam Offline
#34 Posted:
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
IMHO, the opening scene from Patton is one of the best, if not the best, scene ever filmed. George C. Scott BECAME Patton with that one scene and provided the foundation for the movie. I understand that there was a lot of discussion when making the film that the scene was too powerful to begin the film with but that either Francis Ford Coppola (screenplay) or Franklin Shaffner (director) insisted on it. This link has a of a MP3 with his opening speech.

http://victoryatseaonline.com/war/patton.html

John

jgjam Offline
#35 Posted:
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
From the Blazing Saddles collection of lines, they may not be politically correct, but they are still funny!

Baadges.... we don't need no stinkin' badges!

That was lucky! We damn near lost a $400 handcart

Dock that **** a day's pay for napping on the job

Land Snatching... see Snatch

Do you need any help? - Oh, all I can get

and many, many more

John
Charlie Offline
#36 Posted:
Joined: 06-16-2002
Posts: 39,751
I also like the opening in Patton!

Also like something simple like the Duke and Arnold and Clint:

Duke...."A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do"!
"That sounds like Liberty Valance, he's the fastest gun south of the picket line, except for me"!

CLint: "Meet my friends, Smith and Wesson"!
"To tell you the truth I lost count, did I fire 5 or 6 times, but being this is a .44 magnum the most powerful handgun in the world, and it will blow your head off, do you feel lucky punk, well, do you"?

Arnold: "I'll be back"!

Bogey...."I came here for the water"! General.."But Casablanca is in the middle of the desert"!
Bogey..."They didn't tell me"!


Hell, I just love movies, and great lines......here's one of my favorites from a recent movie....Gladiator
Maximus......"On my command, unleash Hell"!


Charlie
jgjam Offline
#37 Posted:
Joined: 05-16-2002
Posts: 909
Of course you can get great lines from any Mel Brooks' movies. A Genius Filmaker!!

John
Robby Offline
#38 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
THE NEW PHONE BOOKS ARE HERE!! THE NEW PHONE BOOKS ARE HERE!! I'M SOMEBODY NOW! DO YOU REALIZE HOW MANY PEOPLE READ THESE BOOKS EVERY DAY!?

THESE CANS! HE HATES THESE CANS!! SAVE YOURSELF!!

Mom, I finaly found my "special purpose".

Robby Offline
#39 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
It looks like you boys dun made a wrong turn, now why don't you just drop them drawrs boy! Yeah come on, COME ON! SQUEALL "WEE WEEEEE WEEEEEEEE!" YEAH Get on down there boy! "WEE WEEEEEEEE!!" SQUEAL LIKE A PIG!
Robby Offline
#40 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
What?
Don't cross the streams.
Why?
It would be bad.
I'm fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean "bad"?
Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously, and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
Total protonic reversal!
Right, that's bad. Okay, alright, important safety tip, thanks Egon.
merlin9052 Offline
#41 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
Whoa!Whoa!Whoa!.....nice shootin' tex!
merlin9052 Offline
#42 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
I aint got time to bleed.....
merlin9052 Offline
#43 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
"I'm goin'to Berlin and shoot that paper hangin' son of a bitch!"


"I noticed a bible in your tent,General.Do you read the bible?
Patton-Yes father,every goddamn day.
Robby Offline
#44 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
Snake Blisken? I heard you were dead?
merlin9052 Offline
#45 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
Rooster Cogburn-Well sister,do you think the lord has a problem with me smokin'a cigar?
Katherine Hepburn-No marshall,i think the good lord himself likes a cigar every now and then.....


I think thats close to the line?????
Eric
merlin9052 Offline
#46 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
My preciousssssssssssssssssssssssssssss......
merlin9052 Offline
#47 Posted:
Joined: 04-25-2003
Posts: 308
This is what we call a Missouri boat ride....
Robby Offline
#48 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Robby Offline
#49 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 5,067
Merlin jogged my memory on this one;

I'm going to take this foot, and I'm going to put it on that side of your face, and you want to know what? "What!?" There's not a damn thing you can do about it!
gerber Offline
#50 Posted:
Joined: 10-30-2002
Posts: 783
"He said, 'Here, take this--it's a suicide pill with a mild laxative effect.' How's THAT for bedside manner?"

from The Ninth Configuration


Ganster to Groucho and Zeppo: "Say, I could use a couple of bozos like you."
Groucho (indignantly): "That's MISTER Bozo to you!"

from Monkey Business


Woman to Groucho: "Hold me closer, closer..."
Grocho: "If I hold you any closer I'll be behind you."

from Animal Crackers (I think)

"Round up the usual suspects" and
"I'm shocked, shocked to find gambling going on in this establishment"
"Your winnings, sir"
"Oh, thank you."

from Casablanca

Oh, and practically any line from The Holy Grail.
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