Always amusing...
1. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding rather than by sodomy or needles shared by junkies.
2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese & North Korean communists.
4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate (such as the numerous Ice Ages) and more affected by soccer moms driving SUVs and/or by cow farts.
6. You have to believe that male/female gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.
7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.
8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.
9. You have to believe that hunters & fishermen don't care about nature, but loony activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
11. You have to believe that the military, not corrupt politicians start wars.
12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.
16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and really a very nice person.
17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.
18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a perjurer and sex offender belonged in the White House.
19. You have to believe that parades displaying drag queens, transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, but manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese government is somehow in the best interest of the United States.
21. You have to believe that the government knows what is best for you, and that you do not know what is best for you.
22. You have to believe that everybody is a victim, and that nobody has to be responsible for his or her own actions.
23. You have to believe that having two mommies and no daddies is a good way to raise a child.
24. You have to believe that tax cuts, tax refunds and tax rebates should only go to people who never paid any taxes in the first place.
25. You have to believe that one-third of the adult population working for a living can somehow support 25% of the population on welfare and food stamps, 20% of the population employed by the government, and the rest retired.
26. You have to believe that spotted owls are an endangered species even though there are zillions of them in Canada.
27. You have to believe that this letter is part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.