jbu:
"A common mistake by the nonbelievers is to lump masturbation, strippers, and aids into one basket."
I'm not. I have know guys who frequent strip clubs on a daily or weekly basis. They also had their "regular" stripper, and dropped ungodly amounts of money in an attempt to look "appealing."
Frankly speaking, after a while you get a general idea as to what the basic female anatomy looks like. It gets boring, and all strippers do (well, SOME strippers) is flaunt their wares without actually selling product. It's kinda like Amway, if you think about it...
"good god my man, why dint you just do like the rest of mankind."
What? Get married?
"Anyway, what did you do when you felt like beating your meat like it owed you money?"
Man, what a flattering picture of the JBU household (snide, but not so serious remark alert)! But in response to your question, I call her my "wife."
"Would Whoppi Goldberg’s picture be considered more appro."
Uh, no.
"What if my spouse looked worse than her?"
There is more to intamite relations between the sexes then appearances. Then again, I hold the same revulsion to tattos and piercings. Now dig up a nekked pictures of a tatooed, and pierced Whoopie Goldberg, and we'll talk...
On a more serious note, I saw this Larry King segment on some chick that had 11 different plastic surgeries over the last 9 years. They did a scene with her putting on her makeup, and I swear to God, she didn't even look HUMAN without her makeup on. In her obsession to be more appealing to the opposite sex, she became one of the most repulsive things I ever saw.
I'll stick with a little more modesty, and an little less alteration, thanks.