Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter.

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1 . Liberals
2. Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement...

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. They became known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided.

Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.

Modern liberals like light imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.. Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink high quality domestic beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, stock brokers, corporate executives, athletes, members of the military, airline pilots and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than North Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to North America. They crept in after the land was settled and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today's lesson in world history:

And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self.....-

There's a "beating head against wall" smiley around here somewhere.

All women are whores,,,,


wheel,,

Let's note that even in Burners singular view of history two things are admitted to as being correct:
Evolution exists.
Liberals come first.


So even a blind dog finds a bone, sometimes......

Poor puppy-dog.... 😞

I'm wondering about all those union members and medical people being on the con team though. woulda thought thems is libs.

I'm really surprised that a little humor brought you out from under your rock.

Oh, I'm always looking in on by BOTL, though I haven't had much time to post.

Nice piece you wrote though. In deed, a little humor. You did leave me wondering that if a person "eats red meat and provides for their women" and they are lesbian, does that make them conservative?

Anyway, keep up the good work. Your writing is unexcelled.

I checked-in a lesbian couple last night going to ROC ... One was feminine, the other super-butch. So much so, I thought she was a dude. Seriously. She took a stern line with me the whole process. I didn't make mention of anything, just was respectable like any other couple, person, group, etc. paid deference to the "dude" of the relationship, like she expected, and I didn't call her "Alice", like the name on her license.

Not that all uncommon a process that I really do see daily, but the one uncommon aspect was the two little boys in strollers they had with them. I had to wonder what kind a world they would grow up in.

Thought provoking, but guess you would have to ask the lesbian to know for sure.

Well I recon that perfect parents are pretty rare. I've seen lots of people screwed up by the less than perfect influence if their parents. Too liberal, too conservative, race hated.....

All I can say is good luck to them.