So if we're in a conference room full of people and it's a working "business lunch":

CHEW WITH YOUR F#CKING MOUTH CLOSED, PEASANT!!!

Seriously, they're going to need a mop in here for the stray chunks of chicken and pasta flying from your mouth (these are original documents -- or were... we'll print them again).

Maybe we'll sweep up the chunks of food you're spewing and we'll feed the local homeless tomorrow. And the next day.

And the chewing noises? Damn, it sounds like a bunch of fat people f#cking...

(Yes, I'm having a rough workweek.)

That's what you get for eating with hot bitches who have no apparent training, culture, or skill set.

Dude. Your life SO sucks.

There's an older Chinese man who works at the airport & three times in the last couple of weeks he's saddled up next to me in the food court to eat his lunch. He eats w/ his mouth open & all the smacking noises are enough to turn my stomach. All 3 times I've had to stop eating, and find another place to sit. Disgusting!

Scott,

You didn't tell me you had MACS over for lunch.


Jet,

Be glad he didn't eat chicken or fish and start spitting the bones out on the table.

Sorry didn't mean to offend.

jet that sucks tell him to f off and that seat is taken next time...

I like da taco, and eating da taco requires one to make lots of noise....sorry

Jet,

Be glad he didn’t eat chicken or fish and start spitting the bones out on the table.



LOL -- a few years ago my wife and I were mountain biking in China (with a guide). we stopped at a "farmers inn" for lunch and order chicken. It took forever for the meal to come out and our guide was nowhere to be found. Turns out our guide had to do the cooking. The Chicken had to be caught, plucked and cooked. It came out in what we named "Chinese Chop" -- take meat cleaver and chop whole chicken into bite sized parts and cook and serve. It is served family style. We take a few bites and and ask our guide what to do with the bones? She said, just spit them on the table. We look at each other and realize that we both hand been leaning against the table on our arms. We lank our arms of the table with a look of " Oh Gross!"


sorry for the ramble -- just brought back a memory of a great trip.

back to our noisy eaters

#3.........I went to an upscale Japanese place once to get a plate of fish and rice.

One of the dishwashers/cooks sat int he booth behind and started "going down" on a big bowl of wet noodles.

It sounded like someone was smacking a giant jellyfish with a boat paddle.............SMACK SLURP SMACK SLURP.

Terrible.

^
That's a great story. I'm glad that there was at least two people here who knew what I was talking about.

re 1

I think it would be perfectly alright to bitch slap'em, just beware of the back splash.

---

"..noisy eaters.."
----------------------

Is this another carpet munching thread?

Sounds like fat people f*cking?


Have you been taping yourself again?


(thankyouthankyouverymuch)


fret

So was he the big boss...c'mon...or else you would of thrown them out after using your original documents as place mats/coasters...

[in my best Androomi voice]

The rest of the world (which is much superior than you mouth breathing americans), eat with their mouth open routinely. Hot food is consumed faster that way. You really don't want to visit Korea Scott. They are probably the loudest food smackers. I have seen all.

You are so inferior. Dummy. Intolerant ****. I gonna put my pecker in your mouth. Hemp rules.

^LOL.


BTW #10 was for #8

#15.....Outstanding........ROFLCOPTER!!!

Howdy, TG.

Scott, I may wear $19 Casios but part of my upbringing included proper table manners & the correct use of table utensils.

As a young insurance exec at a prestigious international insurance brokerage in DC off K St. (in between stints as an hourly worker, LOL), I remember being invited to Duke Ziebert's, Mel Krupin's etc. for swanky lunches where other execs ate like animals stabbing at the meat, speaking with mouthfulls of flailing food, slurping bowls with sounds of emptying bedpans, and holding utensils as if they were carving stone.

These were the same people who were meticulous, to the point of fastidiousness, in their attire and manner.
That is why one should never pretend to be something they're not. You will always be discovered.

I can relate, brother.
Years of being taught by my father on how to eat celery and carrots w/o making a sound & with elbows off the table paid off I suppose.

you too, jade

Scott seems like he was an interesting person.