Krazeehorse
Wednesday, April 1, 2020 5:06:39 PM
A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and

pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.

She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,

"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,

very, closely:

"Are - my - test - results - back?"

bassman45
Wednesday, April 1, 2020 7:56:10 PM
😂😂
jjanecka
Wednesday, April 1, 2020 9:34:09 PM
Nice
Palama
Wednesday, April 1, 2020 9:36:03 PM
Always good to have a good laugh! 👍
CelticBomber
Saturday, April 4, 2020 7:42:47 AM
A Chinese Doctor can't find a job in a Hospital in the US, so he opens his own clinic and puts a sign outside 'GET TREATMENT FOR $20 - IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100.

An American lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.

Lawyer: 'I have lost my sense of taste.

Chinese: 'Nurse, bring medicine from box No. 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth.

Lawyer: 'Ugh. this is kerosene.

Chinese: 'Congrats, your sense of taste is restored. Give me $20.

The annoyed lawyer goes back after a few days to recover his money.

Lawyer: 'I have lost my memory. I cannot remember anything.

Chinese: 'Nurse, bring medicine from box no. 22 and put 3 drops in his mouth.

Lawyer (annoyed): 'This is kerosene. You gave this to me last time for restoring my taste.

Chinese: 'Congrats. You got your memory back. Give me $20.

The fuming lawyer pays him, and then comes back a week later determined to get back $100.

Lawyer: 'My eyesight has become very weak I can't see at all.

Chinese: 'Well, I don't have any medicine for that, so take this $100.

Lawyer (staring at the note): 'But this is $20, not $100!

Chinese: 'Congrats, your eyesight is restored. Give me $20

Love this joke. Really should be a a permanent thread for jokes.

Krazeehorse
Saturday, April 4, 2020 8:07:52 AM
😁
fishinguitarman
Saturday, April 4, 2020 9:34:11 AM
Lmao at both!!!!!
fishinguitarman
Saturday, April 4, 2020 9:43:19 AM
Hadda send this to my RN daughter!
USNGunner
Saturday, April 4, 2020 11:12:09 AM
👍
Gene363
Saturday, April 4, 2020 12:22:32 PM
😂
Krazeehorse
Sunday, April 5, 2020 10:56:56 AM
A Mexican magician told his audience that he would disappear on the count of three. He went Uno, dos..He disappeared without a tres.
Sunoverbeach
Sunday, April 5, 2020 11:46:44 AM
Quatro! Wooly Bully!
izonfire
Sunday, April 5, 2020 12:06:02 PM

A Mexican magician told his audience that he would disappear on the count of three. He went Uno, dos..He disappeared without a tres.

Krazeehorse wrote:

Hay Papi.

¡Gracias!

A double dos...

bassman45
Sunday, April 5, 2020 12:57:53 PM
This is crazy, but it Works. Mine was Casablanca and it is true. Check it out.

Honestly this is kinda crazy!!!

Try this mathematical film test. It's pretty amazing. Mine turned out to be "Casablanca". I was surprised how this worked.

This test will predict which of the 18 films listed below is your favorite. Don't ask me how, but it really works!

Don't cheat and look at the film list till you have done the maths!

Here goes...

Film Test:

Pick a number from 1-9.

Multiply by 3.

Add 3.

Multiply by 3 again.

Now add the two digits together to find your predicted favourite film in the list of 18 films below.

Film List:

1. Gone With The Wind

2. E.T.

3. Beverly Hills Cop

4. Star Wars

5. Forrest Gump

6. The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

7. Jaws

8. Grease

9. The Love of Black C o c k

10. Casablanca

11. Jurassic Park

12. Shrek

13. Pirates of the Caribbean

14. Titanic

15. Raiders Of The Lost Ark

16. Home Alone

17. Mrs. Doubt-fire

18. Toy Story”

RMAN4443
Sunday, April 5, 2020 1:03:17 PM
Damn, it's like a miracle....8-[
frankj1
Sunday, April 5, 2020 1:11:39 PM
ya bastid!
izonfire
Sunday, April 5, 2020 1:14:58 PM
Whatever you need to do to justify your obsession...
delta1
Sunday, April 5, 2020 1:59:21 PM
fucque me... dammit bassman!
Krazeehorse
Sunday, April 5, 2020 3:53:15 PM

fucque me... dammit bassman!

delta1 wrote:

It comes down to being honest with one's own self.

Brewha
Sunday, April 5, 2020 4:01:34 PM
Ok - that’s a good trick.

I didn’t even notice that with 9 choices there are 18 outcomes....