1. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the a hole's name.
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
*BONUS RULE: *
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
Burner02 wrote:
