Some moons back, Chief post e-mail address to help launch $5 bill thread. Since then, many posters have contacted Chief seeking answers and advice on a multitude of issues ranging from art to zucchini. Apparently, these posters can sense Chief's heap medicine and heap wisdom from afar and hope to benefit from his counsel.

Chief not mind. Chief help people for many, many years and really enjoys it. But Chief wonder: Why not go public with this help?

So, here's your chance.

Post your questions and raise your problems here, and Chief will answer with his help on everything--art, fashion, careers, alcohol, etiquette, business, music, pets, parents, religion, politics, etc.--let no subject be taboo!

Simply address your question in this thread to 'Dear Chief' and I will do my best to answer it!

Dear Chief....

There's a Bobcat in my back yard stalking my children.

What do I do????

Cooper

Ok.

Have a low-fat recipie for Zucchini soup that acutally tastes good?

Is this going to be a Carnack kind of thing?

Charlie

grmcooper, #2,

We have this problem here sometimes with housecats and mountain lions. Do what Chief would do:

Kill cat. Send head and fore-paws to Chief.

Dear Chief:

Let's just say, hypothetically, that a wife said the following to her husband:

"Be honest now, honey, 'cause I'm really just curious. Which one of my friends -- if I swore it was okay -- would you most like to sleep with? Really, I won't be mad, I just want to know."

My question to the chief is: Is it better for a guy to sleep in the driver's side of a car with the seat reclined? Or stretched out across the back seat? (Assume that the car is parked near a convenience store and has access to a steady supply of ice for the injuries.)

ScottHar

T.G, #3,

'..a low-fat recipe for good zucchini soup...'

Zucchini grow so well here that people must lock cars to prevent vandals from breaking in and filling them with squash, so Chief understand this one.

First, zucchini: Bah! Best fed to pig.

But if someone insists on making it into some sort of deploreable soup, have them use beer for liquid instead of water or broth. And use lite beer for 'low-fat' soup.

Charlie, #4,

Doesn't Carnock predict future? Mebbe bend spoons?

No, this gonna be 'advice' thread

LMAO at the deplorable soup comment...this should be board on cbid...Askum Big Chief..

Charlie

ScottHar, #6

Wife: '...which of my friends would you like to sleep with...'

Chief's advice would have been: 'ALL OF THEM'. That would have kept squaw on toes for years to come, and probably yielded multiple wet, slippery blowjobs as she would be living in heap fear.

However, you acted without seeking Chiefs counsel and wisdom. So let's deal with current problem: You are sleeping in car, and are wounded. You have Chief's sympathies. What Chief would recommend is sending your squaw some flowers, and then go seek first aid--and hopefully they are not all upper body wounds--from one of squaws friends...

took blue pill

erection over 4 hours

wife hid phone not let me call dr

what me should do?

TDub, Wife is sending heap message!!

Use that erection for what it was meant for!!

Confidentially, Chief have this problem, too. Put on Elton John album, problem go away...

Chief

TW put elton john album on it..... nothing happen.... mebbe try ice instead?

mebbe try elton face down this time

LMAO....rear entry?

Charlie

How would history be different if Sparticus had a Piper-cub?

Dear Cheif,

Who did more work, Hanna or Barbera?

Chief

i before e

How do I get my wife to have sex with me more than once a week?

#14, TDub,

good gawd, that should be a great ****** softener...Chief will remember that 'cure' for future posters who have similar problem.