^Work release is a bitch, isn't it? Gotta be back before the dinner bell, no smoking, and when you get there, no computers and only one TV. Plus, some guy named Big Frank is holding the only remote for the TV, and what Big Frank lacks in brains he makes up for by having just 4-5 rolls between his head and back where most humanoids have a thing called a "neck". Plus, you heard a rumor that the last thing Big Frank ate for dessert was the last guy who suggested changing the channel to something other than Oprah reruns...
Wait, where was I?