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RICKAMAVEN
Herf-A-Holic Topic Starter

14 years ago

SOCCER

ANOTHER SPORT I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

I MISSED THE COIN TOSS SO I DIDN'T KNOW WHO WAS APPOINTED WINNER.

THEN A BUNCH OF AVERAGE LOOKING AMERICAN GIRLS, WHO ARE PROBABLY ABOVE
AVERAGE HEIGHT, ABOUT 5' '6" OR MAYBE MORE, UNABLE TO BREAST FEED AN INFANT,
BUT WITH GREAT LUNGS AND CARDIOVASCULAR SYSTEMS, RAN UP AND DOWN A HUGH
MEADOW TRYING TO SLAM DUNK INTO A VERY LARGE BASKET THAT IS ON HE GROUND
SO THEY DON'T HAVE TO JUMP UP AND DOWN AND HURT THEIR KNEES/

THEN A BUNCH OF WAY BELOW AVERAGE LOOKING, SHORT LITTLE ORIENTAL GIRLS D0
THE SAME THING, AT THE SAME TIME EACH GROUP TRIES TO PREVENT THE OTHER GROUP
FROM KICKING THE LITTLE COLORFUL ROUND BALL. THE BALL IS VERY DIRTY SO NO ONE
IS ALLOWED TO TOUCH IT WITH THEIR HANDS, BUT MUST KICK IT WITH THEIR FEET,
AND BECAUSE THEIR HAIR IS ALWAYS DRIPPING THEY CAN HIT IT WITH THEIR HEADS,
WHICH WILL CLEAN HE BALL.

SINCE NONE OF THE GIRLS EVER LEFT THE MEADOW TO GO TO THE LADIES ROOM,
I ASSUME THEY ARE EITHER WEARING DIAPERS OR HAVE A TUBE FUNNELED UP THEIR
BACKS AND DRAINING THE URINE FROM THEIR HEAD.

I ALSO NOTICED THAT UNLIKE MEN NO ONE EVER PATTED ANYONE ON THE ASS

THE TALL GIRLS AS WAS EXPECTED TRIED TO SCORE A BASKET MANY TIMES FOR
AN HOUR OR TWO. BUT THEY KEPT MISSING UNTIL ALMOST THE HALF TIME COFFEE
OR ICED TEA TIME BREAK.

WHILE THE TABLES WERE BEING SET UP BY THE GERMAN WAITRESSES, WHO WERE
IN A HURRY, NOT WANTING TO MISS THE HALF TIME SHOW, WITH HELICOPTERS
FILLED WITH ISRAELIES, BEING BLOWN UP, THE AMERICAN GIRLS GOT A BASKET.
THEY ALL HUGGED EACH OTHERS WET BODIES. THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE TIME
TO PAT SOMEONE'S WET ASS.

THE AMERICAN GIRLS APPARENTLY WERE NOT INFORMED THE LITTLE ORIENTAL GIRLS
WERE PRESELECTED TO WIN, SO THE LITTLE GIRLS SCORED A BASKET IN A MINUTE OR
SO AND THEY WEREN'T EVEN PISSED AT THE TALL AMERICANS.

AFTER COFFEE BREAK ALL THE GIRLS HAVING DRIED THEIR HAIR WITH THE 220 CONVERTER
PROVIDED. FOR TOURISTS IN EVERY ROOM, THE GIRLS DID THE SAME THINGS THEY DID IN
THE FIRST HALF THE SECOND INNING WITH A SLIGHT DIFFERENCE, THE AMERICAN GIRLS
DIDN'T TRY TO DO A BASKET UNTIL THE INNING WAS ALMOST OVER. THEY DID A BASKET
AGAIN, AND RUBBED EACH OTHERS WET BODIES..

THE AMERICAN GIRLS WERE PISSED AT THEIR NEW LITTLE FRIENDS, AND HAVING WATCHED
SOME FOOTBALL KNEW IF YOU WERE AHEAD BY EVEN 1 POINT THEY STARTED PLAYING
"PREVENT DEFENSE,"KICKING THE BALL TO EACH OTHER AND STANDING CLOSE TO EACH
OTHER LIKE GROWN UPS WILL TEASE LITTLE CHILDREN BY THROWING A TOY TO ANOTHER
GROWN-UP, JUST HIGH ENOUGH THAT THE CHILD CAN'T REACH IT, UNFORTUNATELY FEMALES
DON'T STAY UNTIL THE END OF FOOTBALL GAMES SO THEY DON'T KNOW "PREVENT DEFENSE"
DOESN'T WORK BECAUSE IT USUALLY COST THE PREVENTIVERS THE GAME BECAUSE THE OTHER
TEAM STARTS PLAYING STRONGER OFFENSE.

THE LITTLE DEVILS WAITED UNTIL THE CLOCK HAD ALMOST RUN OUT AND THEY REPEATED
WHAT THEY DID EARLIER, THEY TIED THE SCORE.

THEY WANTED TO PLAY THE CLIMAX OF THE GAME CALLED "HIT THE GOALIE."
THEY KNEW THEY WOULD HAVE A BETTER CHANCE OF HITTING THE BIGGER AMERICAN
GOALIES THEN THE AMERICANS WOULD HAVE HITTING THEIR TINY GOALIES, BUT THE
AMERICANS HAD A BETTER OUTCOME PLANNED.

THE JAPANESE TEAM HAD BETS ON THEIR AMERICAN OPPONENTS. THE AMERICANS HAD BET
ON THEIR SMALLER OPPONENTS.

"WHEN HIT THE GOALIES" TIME CAME, AMERICAN GOALIES SHOWED THEIR SUPERIORITY
BY AVOIDING THE SHOOTERS AND EVERY TIME THE NET SWUNG BECAUSE THE JAPANESE
KICKERS FAILED TO HIT THE GOALIE, THE AMERICAN SMILES GOT BIGGER AND BIGGER
AS THE BOOKIES CRIED AND CRIED BECAUSE THEY HAD BET HEAVILY ON THE AMERICANS
TO WIN.

AND THAT'S WHY I DON'T UNDERSTAND SOCCER, HELL I HAD TO USE SPELL CHECK BECAUSE I WAS SPELLING IT SOCCOR.
.

Edited by user 14 years ago | Reason: Not specified

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HockeyDad
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

Why is this on the politics board?

Maybe we need a misogynist board.

RICKAMAVEN
Herf-A-Holic Topic Starter

14 years ago

IT'S HARD TO SEE YOUR LITTLE PICTURE VERY WELL.

IS THAT A HUMP ON YOUR BACK?

FOOTBALL INJURY?

THE ONLY OTHER BOARD I KNOW OF IS FOR PICTURES OF MY GRANDSON.

Edited by user 14 years ago | Reason: Not specified

ZRX1200
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

RICK.

WHY DO YOU HATE WOMEN?????!!!!

RICKAMAVEN
Herf-A-Holic Topic Starter

14 years ago

HockeyDad

I AM NOT A LICENSED MISOGYNIST.

ZRX1200
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

BUT YOU PLAY ONE ON THE INTERWEBS!

RICKAMAVEN
Herf-A-Holic Topic Starter

14 years ago

ZRX1200

I THINK YOU ARE COPYING FROM SOMEONE ELSE'S POST.

ORIGINALITY COUNTS FOR SOMETHING

RICKAMAVEN
Herf-A-Holic Topic Starter

14 years ago

IF ANYONE THAT READS THIS HAS A SENSE OF HUMOR, YOU MIGHT FIND THIS LITTLE STORY AMUSING.

IF YOU DON'T PLEASE MOVE ON, THERE IS NOTHING HERE FOR YOU.

ZRX1200
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

Ha!!!

Nicar
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#10

No, you may find it full of ignorance reading the OP, and if you did type it yourself....it is even more ignorant seeing the one who can slaim to typing that.

MTappert
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#11

i find this extremely humorous

snowwolf777
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#12

I think ass patting, open-mouth kissing, and other PDAs would go a long way to getting me to watch more women's soccer. And volleyball. And basketball.

Juss sayin'

🍺

MTappert
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#13

i would root for player #69.

just sayin

bloody spaniard
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#14

I bet there's a few grammasans who remember Rickasan. [gonzo]
As a kid growing up, I remember running into more than one WWII veteran who never bought anything Japanese.

Congrats to the their soccer victory. Japan needed it.

DrafterX
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#15

I think that was the plan..... cause of the tsunami and the nuclar meltdown and stuff.... 😟

HockeyDad
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#16

I bet there's a few grammasans who remember Rickasan. [gonzo]
As a kid growing up, I remember running into more than one WWII veteran who never bought anything Japanese.

bloody spaniard wrote:

Ricka "Cotton Hill" Maven

chiefburg
Herf-A-Holic

14 years ago

#17

See, Rick has a sense of humor.......

You didn't plagerize this, did you????

I think soccer would be much more fun (women's, that is) is they DID allow flagrant kissing, fondling, touching, and pajama parties during the game. Maybe a wet t-shirt contest to decide the winner would be better than deciding the game by an assortment of kicks......mmmm.....wet t-shirts and boobies......

Papachristou
Aficionado

14 years ago

#18

did rick get some laced weed or something? i havent dabbled in any of those vices so i dont know what kind of drug would cause this extreme randomness and disrespect for some hard working, dedicated girls who went out and played their hearts out for their country. I dont enjoy any post that makes fun of a team representing the USA.

Rick, spell check m0therfucker!