engletl, #138,

Did daughter help you and squaw clean up?

If so, Chief recommend you buy $20 wine for you and squaw for your efforts, and let maiden keep $100 for her savings.

It only fair!

chief -

ummmm, methinks chant not work.

radar shows heap big raincloud.

is skiridemaine doesn't get sun from now until october there may be no funds for enjoying snow this winter!

thanks anyway.

LOL...

Baby squaw didn't help she is only 18 months old.

Boss squaw prefers Crown Royal

SkiRide, #142,

Then Chief gonna repeat, as necessary...you tell him when whether change...

#143, Engletl,

$20 buy Crown Royal, too!

And 18 months is not too early to begin learning the importance of saving wampum!

chief -

Rain stopped. We are all heap happy.

Now, don't forget about January!

ps- how can i get a 16 mo. old to stop pointing at older ladies' "areas" in the grocery store and saying "nine-ah"

(see link)

http://www.cigarbid.com/auction/forum/forum.cfm?action=list&forumID=9&messageDisplay=0000000210019 

heap thanks chief. Private message work. Wife like snorkel now bends over hot tub no problem.

#146, SkiRide,

Glad rain stopped!

Mebbe re-explain to child that it's really called something else? Tough question...

#147, Baron,

Chief glad to help!

????!

re: 148 -

will try, chief.

he can't yet form words to say "bear struck by axe"

but i'll think of something else...

ps - heap thanks on rain thing!

wed. = sunny!

thurs. = showers

mebbe you drink more and dance every night?

Dear Chief--

A very sexy younger woman I work with asked if she could take me across the street after work, buy me a drink, and ask me some professional advice on some career issues she's facing.

I'm happily married so this is obviously a TERRIBLE idea and there's no way I could say yes to this sort of invitation. But what if we went to a bar farther away from the office?

ScottHar

^ parking garage....

[need an answer in the next 3 hours or...]

ScottHar

#151 Funny. No, have her meet you at the nearest courthouse. Whatever temptations find you will soon dissipate as you sit there, contemplating how much a divorce would cost you, and how much you'd miss your stuff.

#151, scotthar,

Chief won't re-hash you question. You already know the answer, or you wouldn't have asked in the first place.

Chief could offer a number of anectdotes about the wacky dangers of having girlfriends whilst married--and the unimaginable **** that can happen--but he will refrain.

Trust me when I advise that young women who want to 'talk' to you after work over a drink have ulterior motives.

Trust me also when I advise that, if your marriage is sour, you DO NOT WANT IT TO GO COMPLETELY SOUTH OVER A YOUNG FEMALE.

Wives do not like this stuff. I know, and this is the voice of heap experience.

^As usual, Chief: Good advice for a bad question.

Thanks!

ScottHar

Dear Chief:

How do I get the hair from growing so rapidly in my ears and nose?

FishingGuitarMan asks: 'Chief, how get hair growth in nose and ears to slow down?'

Chief has this same problem, and understands these issues. Sometimes Chief wonders if someone isn't putting Miracle Grow on parts of head at night--especially on eyebrows, where 2 1/2" hairs have been known to sprout out of nowhere.

FGM, Chief will take wild guess on how to stop this stuff: Testicle-rone is widely believed to be at the root of male hair growth, so you may wish to simply cut off the source of this hormone through a simple castration procedure.

Now, it is heap important to understand that no one has yet proven this will stop Male Unwanted Hair (MUH!), but if you desperate, it might be worth a try...

Personally, Chief prefers to remove hair the old fashioned way: grab wads of nose-hair with fingers, and pull hard. Repeat as necessary.

Dear Chief--

I just read that a bunch of construction workers in Oregon complained to police that an attractive young lady was skating around nude -- and they were bothered by this.

http://www.cigarbid.com/auction/forum/forum.cfm?action=list&forumID=9&messageDisplay=0000000223931 

Question: I... I just... I mean, I don't think I could work with guys who called the police to complain about a nude chick. So I guess my question is WTF? Forget Obama vs. McCain, isn't this country in deeper trouble than any of us suspected?

ScottHar

Poster ScottHar asks '...is country in heap poo-poo...'

Dear Scott,

Chief is forced to assume that those construction workers were gay, or squaws dressed as men (in order to get some prevailing wage money).

No healthy male avoids looking at nekkid squaw. Other

possibility is that nekkid squaw was so heap ugly that the view was offensive.

Chief unable to open article on cheerleaders, so again, must make assumption. To wit, heap squaws in audience angry because their men were looking at cheerleaders instead of them selves--jealous squaws!

But Chief digresses. You ask if world is going to hell in handbasket, and the answer is...(drumroll)

Yes! Heap yes!

The feminization of America began to really roll in the late 1970's, and U.S. go downhill ever since.

Chief suggest you seek local chapter of M.A.C.H.O. club, and join. Heap therapeutic...